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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26561188">Just a Summer Bromance</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/LozisLaw/pseuds/LozisLaw'>LozisLaw</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>South Park</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Camping is gay, Closeted Character, Everyone Is Gay, F/F, Falling In Love, Games, Hot Weather, M/M, Summer Camp, Wacko Shmackos</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-09-20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 09:35:45</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>18,216</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26561188</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/LozisLaw/pseuds/LozisLaw</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Kyle is forced to summer camp where he meets an array of colourful characters and forms an instant bond with one particular cute-smiled, black-haired boy who shows him kindness where he expects none. The only problem is the secret he's hiding from everyone, and sometimes himself, that may be detrimental to how he makes the most of this horrible, horrible summer.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Bebe Stevens/Wendy Testaburger, Craig Tucker/Tweek Tweak, Kenny McCormick/Leopold "Butters" Stotch, Kyle Broflovski/Stan Marsh, Token Black/Clyde Donovan</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>51</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>102</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>You're all so lovely, *sighh*, thank you for clicking on my precious little bastard &lt;3</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p> </p><p>Kyle lost his collective shit when he heard the news that he was being sent to summer camp. The whole fucking summer. He threw a menora at the window, shattering the glass, and got grounded, the cost of getting a window replacement cut out of his allowance.</p><p>His parents had recently decided that Kyle was not coping in a constructive or healthy way all year, and they’d finally had enough of what they called angry tantrums of rage that usually got physical and ended up with something in the house broken.</p><p>It wasn’t his fault. His temper was fucking fine. It was a perfectly reasonable response to the whole world sucking ass. He had a good goddamn reason for losing his temper all the goddamn time. His parents couldn’t know- probably ever, but that wasn’t even his biggest concern. He wasn’t ready to come out, probably until college, when he was too far away from anyone who matters to care what he called himself. But right now, he couldn’t live in the shadow of his sexuality, what with the stupid assholes and homophobes lurking in his town.</p><p>He had actually been looking forward to summer. Reading, being alone, listening to lots of music in the privacy of his room. That’s his idea of a good summer. Fuck socialisation, that shit is for the birds. He didn’t really get along with people at school anyway. He wouldn’t be participating in their summer.</p><p>So hearing that he actually would, and he wasn’t even the only person from his town being sent off, was the ultimate red flag in his book of danger and- <em>stop! Don’t even go there, you’ll die. </em>He kicked up such a storm about the whole idea, that he was grounded indefinitely, until he either sorted out his attitude or the time came for camp. Either way, according to them, he’d come back mellowed the fuck out. As fucking if, some gross sweaty camp with a bunch of adolescent teenagers, he’ll come back more strung out than ever. Especially if he’s being surrounded by sweaty shirtless boys, bunking with them, doing mandatory activities, communal showers. It’s like his ultimate fantasy and ultimate nightmare mixed into one. No, he will not mellow the fuck out. He will likely pop, and they’ll have to scrap him off the sidewalk, his brain and his dick exploded.</p><p>Kyle scowled the afternoon he found a pile of shit his mother bought for camp on the kitchen floor, along with a list of necessary items to bring. He skimmed over the list in disgust. They actually wanted him to bring hiking shoes and sunscreen. As if he’d forget fucking sunscreen, he was basically a ghost that would crisp in the sun, and he would break both of his legs before he willingly went hiking. His mother had already bought both, a brand new pair of hiking boots, and a giant tub of sunscreen guaranteed to last a lifetime. Kyle cringed when he imagined hoisting this shit along with him as he got to camp. He’d be a laughing stock. Fuck, he was so not looking forward to this.</p><p>The night before his mom was to drive him up to the rockies where the camp was located, Kyle lay awake thinking up excuses to not go, and scrapping them when they didn’t make sense. He couldn’t fake being sick, because she’d just take him a week later when he got ‘better’. He couldn’t fake a cold all summer. Not a believable one anyway. He considered pretending to get AIDS, but that’s already happened, and he couldn’t get away with it <em>again</em>. Technically, he was properly treated for it anyway.</p><p>Ugh, he found out at school that Cartman was going to camp too. And he was one of the few enviable bastards that were looking forward to it. Kyle dreaded spending the next three months with the lard. He’d kick his ass so many times if that’s what it took to leave him alone in peace.</p><p>A few others were heading along to camp with them too. To recall them talking about it, Cartman, Clyde, Bebe, Craig, Tweek, Jimmy, and Nichole were going. Basically half his class. Fucking fantastic.</p><p>Kyle hoped he could get away with ditching sporty water filled activities if he could, hiding books in his bag. Technically, the rules of the camp included no reading. That was utter bullshit, so of course Kyle wouldn’t follow them. He doubted the camp advisers would much care some pale spindly redhead sat out of camp games to read about civil war histories.</p><p>That morning they were set to leave, Kyle groaned and scowled at everything, listlessly kicking around his bags, willing them to get in the car so he didn’t have to bother packing them. His mother tsked and ended up putting them in for him, as Kyle scowled again and stated again: <em>he didn’t want to go to fucking camp.</em></p><p>She brushed him off, annoyingly chirpy and flitting around the house to pack everything he needed. Kyle was offended she barely seemed to be troubled that he would be gone for the whole summer. She looked relieved if anything. He hadn’t been that fucking moody, Jesus. It’s not like he’d get some epiphany at camp and suddenly come back smiling like a daisy.</p><p>Kyle puttered around as she packed, avoiding helping seal his doom. He went into Ike’s room at one point, who was on his computer with headphones on.</p><p>‘’Hey,’’ Kyle slaps Ike’s shoulder when Ike doesn’t notice him in the room. Ike jumps and turns to Kyle.</p><p>‘’What?’’</p><p>‘’I’m leaving today,’’ Kyle reminds him.</p><p>‘’Oh yeah. Camp right? Goddamn, that sounds depressing. Have fun there,’’ Ike snorts, turning back to his game.</p><p>‘’Jesus, I’m so saddened by your concern for missing me all summer,’’ Kyle says, rolling his eyes.</p><p>‘’Yeah, yeah. I’ll miss you and all that shit. Wish I was going with you. But not really, cos camp is gay,’’ Ike says.</p><p>‘’I’m gay,’’ Kyle says.</p><p>‘’No kidding. You should have a blast then,’’ Ike laughs, putting his headphones back on. Kyle snorts, flicking Ike’s head before leaving the room. His brother is the only one who knows about him, but that’s because Kyle couldn’t deign hiding a secret from him. Ike’s an inquisitive little busy body who’d have snuffed him out by now, so Kyle found it easier to just tell him. Plus, he had his unbridled support for the day that Kyle broke and finally told his parents. In a few decades, maybe.</p><p>When Sheila finally finishes her packing for an angrily unhelpful Kyle, they get in the car and leave for the rockies.</p><p>Kyle is moody the whole trip, curling in on himself in the front seat while watching the passing nature and pine trees. The yearly snow has finally melted, now a hotbox of sweltering heat that’ll last for the summer before icing over again. Yuck. Kyle is in shorts and a short sleeved polo shirt, hating his exposed pale thighs, destined to burn red in the sun when he lets them, but too hot to wear anything more. At least in winter he could hide his frankly wimpish frame in big coats and shit, but now it’s out in the open for everyone to gaze upon just how skinny he really is. Another very annoying thing, that bothers Kyle even more than the clothes, is that it’s too fucking hot to wear his ushanka. It never even comes off for winter, and now his humiliating bees nest is springing out in the open for everyone to see. He’s so fucking embarrassed, especially since there’ll be kids coming in from all over the Park County area for camp. He’s just relieved he’ll be in the oldest age group.</p><p>The camp is called something horrifically racist, considering that the land used to belong to the native American Tribes in this area, and was taken and now owned by some rich asshole in a chair in Denver. He did some light research about it. They gave it some tacky traditional name meant to honour the ‘Indians’ as they call them, when really it’s actually a slurring derogatory term meant to make offend muslims. In the end they offend everyone.</p><p>And that’s where Kyle will be trapped for the next 3 months.</p><p>Sheila had been trying to incorporate sunny small talk to get rid of Kyle’s scowl on the way there. Which was a failing battle.</p><p>‘’Bubbeh, aren’t you excited to be with your friends all summer long! Doing fun games and activities- the brochures even said they have a big inflatable water slide on special occasions! It goes right into the lake,’’ Sheila exclaims, jostling Kyle’s shoulder, which he shirks off.</p><p>‘’That sounds retarded. And I don’t have any friends,’’ Kyle mutters.</p><p>‘’Don’t use that derogatory language Kyle! And you do have friends- what about that sweet Eric boy?’’</p><p>Kyle nearly vomits in disgust, giving his mother a look of hellfire.</p><p>‘’He is not my friend! He is a fat sadistic asshole!’’ Kyle yells. Sheila winces, and Kyle groans.</p><p>‘’Well, he seems nice to me. Why don’t you try making some new friends while you’re here, bubbeh? You know they’ll be kids your age there from Fairplay, Middle Park, maybe even Denver!’’</p><p>‘’Entitled snobs you mean,’’ Kyle says.</p><p>‘’Don’t be so judgemental of them Kyle, try to open up and make some friends. Who knows, you might even meet a sweet girl to be your little girlfriend- wouldn’t you like that?’’</p><p>Kyle doesn’t answer, feeling a pit lurch in his stomach at what she doesn’t know. He’ll be hearing the words ‘girlfriend’ a lot before he leaves for college. And probably after too.</p><p>‘’Maybe they’ve got some Jewish kids you can introduce yourself too. Wouldn’t that be nice? Meeting some other kids like you- maybe even there’s a nice Jewish girl amongst that crowd!’’ Sheila exclaims, beside herself.</p><p>‘’Mmhmm,’’ Kyle mumbles, not speaking again for the rest of the journey, turning himself against the window to watch the passing forestry and ignore his slamming heart.</p><p>When they arrived at the foot of the campsite, in the parking zone near the front entrance, Kyle groaned and slunk down as his mom muttered about collecting his bags. They brought too many, Kyle is embarrassed by it when he sees some other kids entering the place with one of two bags in total, whereas Kyle had five. He felt like a girl, full of clothes and shit he thought he needed, even though he barely packed this shit himself. Sheila probably sneaked meals in some of the those bags for him, gross Kosher stuff that he would be tormented for by Cartman if seen in public. He was not looking forward to this at all.</p><p>He delays getting out of the car, not oblivious to the fact that his mom is watching him, not getting out either. He avoids her eyes and keeps his tiredly looking at the kids walking around with their bags at the entrance. He doesn’t recognise anyone yet.</p><p>‘’Kyle- remember to stay safe, I don’t want you trying things just because the other kids are. If you see any joints- don’t smoke them, your lungs are too weak, and that stuff is dangerous. Remember to be in range of the instructors and lifeguards at all times. Don’t wander into the woods by yourself. And remember you can call me on your phone if you need anything, bubbeh,’’ Sheila says. Kyle doesn’t answer, still feeling vaguely sick to the stomach.</p><p>‘’Try and have a good time this summer. I’m worried about you Kyle, you never seem to be enjoying yourself. I wanted you to go here to make some new friends, let go of school- you’ve been doing well, but the teachers say your behaviour is atrocious -oui!’’</p><p>‘’That’s not my fault,’’ Kyle says, avoiding that obvious trap to reignite the fight they’ve been having. ‘’I’m just gonna be alone this whole time. I don’t make friends mom,’’ Kyle tries, recognising some of his classmates entering the campsite now.</p><p>‘’But that can always change bubbeh! Don’t put your walls and expectations up so high, and you might find you make some really close friends this summer. Don’t be so negative before you’ve even tried it,’’ his mother says. Kyle moans pathetically, slouching in his seat. There’s nothing he can do now to avoid it, but prolonging the inevitable seems like a better option in the time being.</p><p>‘’Everyone sucks here, I don’t even have to meet them, because everyone is the same.’’</p><p>‘’Maybe you just need a little girlfriend to make you happier,’’ Sheila suggests with a smile.</p><p>‘’Girls suck ass,’’ Kyle says without thinking. He expects his mom to start prodding, but she smiles again.</p><p>‘’Oi- bubbeh, you’re still my sweet little boy. One day you’ll change your mind- don’t worry Kyle,’’ Sheila says. Kyle imagines telling her then and there what’s actually going on. <em>I like boys. I’m not too young, I just think cocks are hotter than tits. I think about boys fucking me all day long. I’m gay.</em></p><p>Kyle stays silent, and eventually Sheila kisses his cheek and finally gets out of the car to get his bags. Kyle feels drained by an admission he didn’t even tell, lethargically collecting some once he slumps out of the car. The sun is already beating down, and Kyle regrets not putting on sunscreen earlier. Now he’ll have to do it while he’s at camp, in front of everybody, and they’ll pick on him until the fucking cows come home.</p><p>He feels eyes on him when they enter the campsite, and Kyle realises it’s because Sheila is still with him, helping carry his bags. He burns bright red when he sees that the other parents left at the front entrance. And here he is, the baby, getting his mom’s help to get his bags.</p><p>‘’Mom, you can go now. I’ve got it from here,’’ Kyle tries pathetically, keeping his voice down lower.</p><p>‘’Nonsense Kyle, these bags are much too heavy for you to carry on your own,’’ Sheila tsks, and Kyle hears snickers.</p><p>‘’Mom, seriously, it’s fine. Can you just please fuck off now,’’ Kyle pleads, glancing around him.</p><p>‘’Kyle! Don’t use that language with me!-‘’</p><p>Like a godsend, a counsellor appeared before them with a grinning smile and a clipboard.</p><p>‘’Hi there! Do you guys need a hand getting that stuff put away?’’ the counsellor asks.</p><p>‘’Oh yes please, thank you counsellor,’’ Sheila said, suddenly all smiles as she passed the bags in her hands to him, and Kyle gave him one of his, staring. He was blonde in a hayseed kind of way, a kind of handsome that others would drop their panties for, grinning lazily. He was tall as fuck, and Kyle suddenly felt like a short little kindergartner, years his junior.</p><p>‘’So what’s your name dude?’’ the counsellor asks when he starts heading towards the cabins hauling the bags.</p><p>‘’Kyle Broflovski,’’ Kyle answers sullenly, glancing around him at the others already seeming like they’ve got the hang of this camp thing.</p><p>‘’That’s cool. Hey mom, I think Kyle’s got it from here. Parents technically aren’t allowed in the cool camp after drop off,’’ the counsellor chuckles.</p><p>‘’Oh of course,’’ Sheila says, happy to hand over any authority to a guy with a clipboard. Regardless, Kyle is relieved he will no longer be parading around with the buxom woman who is to everyone so obviously his mother. Their hair is rare and identical, it’s not so hard to connect the dots. After giving Kyle an embarrassing goodbye with public kisses and hugs that reddened the fuck out of his face, Sheila walked back to the car. Kyle didn’t look back, too angry and humiliated to feel sentimental about not seeing her for three months. He was fucking glad he didn’t have to see her, she just fucked up his life every moment she could fit in to give a crap about him.</p><p>‘’So Kyle, where are you from dude?’’ the counsellor asks as they entered the cabin Kyle would be staying at. They put his bags down, and Kyle claims an empty bottom bunk to be safe.</p><p>‘’South Park,’’ Kyle says, looking around at the wood panelled cabin with two bunk beds lined up opposite each other on the wall. The cabin is smaller than he expected, but maybe that’s a good thing. He wouldn’t really want to be sharing a cabin with a fuckton of filthy boys. Hot, sweaty, muscular filthy boys. Jesus.</p><p>‘’You’ll get three roommates to stay with, you’ll meet them in a little bit. Wanna know where everything else is?’’ the counsellor asks, setting down Kyle’s bags in the middle of the room.</p><p>‘’Um, yes- I think,’’ Kyle says, standing at the doorway with what the counsellor must see as fright.</p><p>‘’Hey, it’s okay. C’mon, I’ll show you around. My name’s Kenny, so you can call me that instead of ‘counsellor’,’’ Kenny chuckles. Kyle nods, feeling the stomach sickness coming back.</p><p>‘’So where are you from?’’ Kyle asks as they exited the cabin, though he hardly cared.</p><p>‘’Fairplay, not that someone like you cares right?’’ Kenny says, grinning back at Kyle. Kyle flushes, afraid Kenny caught him. ‘’I’m just riffing dude, don’t look like you’re being led to the slaughter.’’</p><p>Kenny laughs, and Kyle just keeps his head down, trying to swallow the bile rising in his throat.</p><p>‘’You’ll find the camp has bathrooms everywhere, you know for those emergency moments. I know boys like to piss everywhere and in the woods and shit, and that’s cool, but this camp is shared with girls, so if you really wanna impress or god forbid hook up with one of the foxes, you better keep that behaviour to yourself.’’</p><p>Kyle feels scandalised. ‘’Aren’t you like 25? And you’re perving on sixteen year old girls,’’ Kyle wonders if he will have to report this guy, if this will be one of <em>those</em> camps. Kenny laughs hard.</p><p>‘’Oh god, that’s hysterical. Dude! I’m your age!’’ Kenny keeps laughing, and Kyle scowls, trying to picture it. Kenny looks like a fucking adult, there’s no way he’s only sixteen.</p><p>‘’You’re fucking with me,’’ Kyle says.</p><p>‘’I’m not even fucking with you dude. Counsellors can be any age here, as long as you work right? Fuck,’’ Kenny is still chuckling as he leads Kyle around. Kyle is trying to be sullen and pissed off, but he has to admit Kenny has a bit of a swarming presence, so it’s impossible to actually stay angry at him when the motherfucker is just so happy and smiley, cracking even more dirty comments and jokes as he introduced the whole camp to Kyle.</p><p>‘’Aren’t there other kids that need guides? You’ve just been showing <em>me</em> around,’’ Kyle points out after Kenny shows him the dining cafeteria where they eat all meals.</p><p>‘’Eh, some of these kids are douchebags, I didn’t wanna meet them. But I did notice your mom clawing her talons into you, so I thought I’d help out’’ Kenny says.</p><p>‘’Well, thanks’’ Kyle says, slightly surprised. ‘’How come you’re not attending as a camper? The oldest campers can be seventeen.’’</p><p>‘’Ah, yes. One of the joys of camp, is all the opportunities for the older ones. The guys who own this place haven’t thought very hard, though. Think about it, you’ve got a mixed group of teenage girls and boys having fun with tons of water based activities, getting shirts wet, the ripe time when horniness and healthy sex age collide. Doubtless a bunch of these lucky boys will be losing their virginity this summer. As if I’m missing that. Alas, god decreed the McCormicks would never afford such a heavenly summer, so I have to work to stay here. Oh well, the price for pussy.’’</p><p>‘’Uh, ha, yeah,’’ Kyle tries to sound partial to the discussion, though his face just gets hot at the implications of the topic. Hopefully Kenny would assume he’s just a nervous virgin, not hiding a world-ending secret. It’s not like he’s not a virgin anyway. Who’s he gonna fuck anyway? There’s fuck all options in South Park.</p><p>‘’So I’m guessing you haven’t had much choice in coming here right?’’ Kenny smiles as they walk back to the centre of the camp site, where a large open area with an enormous bonfire pit in the middle, and kids already start crowding around it.</p><p>‘’I’m not really camp material,’’ Kyle says glumly, remembering where he could’ve been if his mother hadn’t meddled with his summer.</p><p>‘’You know I’ve got some friends who’ve come here, I could introduce you,’’ Kenny offers.</p><p>‘’Who’s your friends?’’ Kyle asks, a brand new wave of nervousness hitting him when he realised this would be his life for the next three months. The awkwardness of meeting new people, potential assholes, and the pointlessness of getting close to any of them because they lived in other towns, and visiting just felt like too much effort. He didn’t exactly have proper friends back in South Park either.</p><p>‘’C’mon, I’ll find ‘em so you can see for yourself,’’ Kenny says, pulling Kyle along. Kyle braces himself for the worst, wondering if he’s gonna resort to hiding alone all summer from being bullied for his highly recognisable hair and easily burning skin. He’s secretly relieved Kenny is helping him, despite having no reason to, beyond seeing some mopey motherfucker being dragged along by his buxom force of a mother.</p><p>‘’So I go to school with these guys, and they’re great. I have a feeling you’re gonna get along just peachy with us,’’ Kenny says.</p><p>‘’If you say so,’’ Kyle says, not wanting to sound ungrateful. He wasn’t sure if he should be relieved Kenny is helping him, or wanting to run for the hills for a grown-ass man looking dude wanting Kyle to meet his ‘friends’. Maybe this was how they recruited people into cults.</p><p>‘’You’re still looking like I’m gonna bring you to a corner and murder you,’’ Kenny observes, sliding a smirk Kyle’s way. Kyle rolls his eyes.</p><p>Kenny leads him past the cabins to the biggest building of the campsite, a proper house with cabin-esque aesthetics. They head into the cafeteria, and Kyle’s nerves turn over in his stomach when they head straight into the thick of a group, who stop and turn to them like they were waiting to begin the scrutiny. Kyle’s edge intensifies.</p><p>‘’Hey dudes,’’ Kenny greets, waving.</p><p>‘’Hi Kenny! Where did you wander off to?’’ an even smaller boy than Kyle, with annoyingly neon hair chirps. Kyle glances over each of them.</p><p>‘’Just settling in these other campers, speaking of which- guys. Meet Kyle,’’ Kenny says, basically, shoving Kyle into their faces for introduction. Kyle feels like punching Kenny in the face for doing this, the one way he dreaded most, but he couldn’t manage to turn around and do it when what he’s pushed into was the bluest eyes he’s ever seen.</p><p>Kyle loses all breath immediately, unblinking.</p><p>‘’Oh, sorry dude,’’ the smiling pink lips attached to the eyes says, bracing Kyle’s shoulders from him falling. Kyle shakes himself into consciousness, fumbling muttered apologies and stepping back with a beat red face. ‘’Hi.’’</p><p>The blue eyes becomes but a piece of a majestic thing- a boy, with satin-like black hair and a tallness that had never before made Kyle curl his toes in his shoes before.</p><p>‘’Kyle, this is Stan. I need you to be his fill-in friend for me at camp so he doesn’t pester me and get me fired,’’ Kenny says, slapping Kyle’s shoulder.</p><p>‘’Shut up dude,’’ Stan laughs, rubbing the back of his neck. ‘’I’m not that bad, I swear.’’ He looks at Kyle for this, and Kyle feels an actual heart palpitation coming on- and it will be the death of him.</p><p>‘’Okay,’’ Kyle laughs like a complete dork, and already he’s blown it. What the fuck has he blown though? See, this is why he fucking hated camp. God fucking dammit.</p><p>He forces himself to look anywhere else but the eyes, and found himself being introduced to the rest of the friends Kyle had conveniently blocked out of sight up until then.</p><p>The perky small blonde kid’s name was Butters, and apparently he was the runt of the group, or just the punching bag. Kyle realised if Cartman ever met him, he’d have a field day. Because without trying, the boy was undeniably, incredibly gay. It screamed it out from his clothes, to his hair, to his aura. Kyle felt on edge just being near him, as though they’d pin him like that too just by association. But that was a horribly homophobic way of thinking.</p><p>Kenny introduces him to Token, a dark-skinned boy taller than everybody, and holding himself up with an air Kyle was curious and slightly suspicious about. He was friendly though.</p><p>‘’Where’s Wendy?’’ Kenny asks when Kyle has acquainted all of the friends, subtly glancing at Stan again.</p><p>‘’She and Red are making friends with some of the new girls at camp,’’ Butters says, smiling at Kenny. Kyle felt bad for him. He knew almost immediately what was happening.</p><p>‘’Ah, I see. You’ll meet her later anyway dude,’’ Kenny shrugs to him.</p><p>‘’So where are you from Kyle?’’ Stan asks, the question directed at him zipping up Kyle’s spine with a thrill.</p><p>‘’Oh, ah- South Park,’’ Kyle says.</p><p>‘’Cool. We’re all from Fairplay- we go to the same school,’’ Stan says.</p><p>‘’I’ve told him all this Stanley,’’ Kenny smirked.</p><p>‘’Right right, of course,’’ Stan grins, and Kyle officially dies at the sight of it. Fucking camp.</p><p>‘’Do you have anything else to do today?’’ Butters asks Kenny hopefully.</p><p>‘’Yeah, I gotta prepare for same lame-ass induction ceremony- which I guess is your guys ceremony too. You know what we should do- we should kick off this summer with a midnight lake run tonight.’’</p><p>‘’That sounds fun,’’ Token says.</p><p>‘’Won’t we get in trouble?’’ Butters asks nervously, rubbing his knuckles together. Kenny laughs and hugs Butters’ shoulders.</p><p>‘’Don’t worry Butterscotch, I’m your free ticket to doing whatever the fuck you like this summer,’’ Kenny says, smiling when Butters laughs at his head being propped on top of his like it’s nothing. Kyle watches the exchange with mild interest, which is squashed when Stan pays him attention again, tugging his polo shirt.</p><p>‘’Do you wanna come with?’’ Stan asks with a hopeful smile.</p><p>Kyle should have said no, he hated swimming and all the germs and wetness that went with it. But this was a perfect example of the many times this summer he realises he will always say yes to Stan.</p><p>‘’Okay,’’ Kyle says.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p>The induction ceremony is probably the gayest event Kyle has attended in his life.</p><p>He had to hand it to camp, he thought they’d done their best to make the experience the faggiest one ever, but they outdid themselves.</p><p>The camp counsellors were chirpy, unbearable and as utterly gay as those anti-smoking enthusiast speakers back in fourth grade. He was disconnected from the Fairplay kids Kenny introduced him to in the shuffle of getting organised, and Kyle was seated amongst random boys and girls he felt disenfranchised with. He didn’t exactly feel like he was eager to rejoin the Fairplay group again either, but so far that crowd seemed better for first impressions than sitting alone. He sensed they were popular, so it wouldn’t hurt. Kyle just didn’t want to be labelled the dorky loner he obviously was, not even an hour into camp.</p><p>It also wouldn’t hurt to talk to Stan again, but that isn’t the <em>only</em> reason he wants to hang out with them. It isn’t. It’s merely a perk. Stan just seems like a cool dude he could make friends with. He’d declared to himself after he was introduced that he would hope for nothing more than friendship- okay? Nothing more, he’d been flattered enough to not be openly scoffed at by the beautiful- <em>beautiful</em> son of a bitch.</p><p>After the camp induction, where rules were laid out by the senior counsellors, the campers are encouraged to go to their assigned cabins to be introduced to their cabin-mates. That part Kyle is already dreading, having to meet even more random people he’d probably never see again after this gay ass summer.</p><p>He didn’t catch the Fairplay group again after the meeting. He did see them from a distance, but the familiarity between them intimidated Kyle too much to go back over and talk again.</p><p>So he goes back to the cabin Kenny brought him to, nervous about being the first guy there. Apparently the other kids in the cabin had better things to do. After fifteen minutes, Kyle gives up on hoping they’ll show up, and just leaves the cabin to wander the camp he’ll be trapped in this summer.</p><p>A lot of these teens look like they’ve been raised here and know the ropes perfectly, and Kyle’s insecurities rise when he realises how out of place he must look. The obvious tense awkwardness he feels radiating out to everyone is bad enough, but his untameable red hair on top of it? Forget it, he’s screwed.</p><p>It’s probably too late to go back with the Fairplay group either. He squandered his chance, and now it’s too late. He’ll be that lame loner no one wants to talk to for fear of catching his lameness. Fucking great, his worst fears confirmed, life over, summer ruined with this pointless shit. Fuck his mother for bringing his pathetic ass here.</p><p>There’s a patch of green before the dense woods that line the camp, behind the rec room but isolated enough for others to not judge him, but clean enough to habit, and Kyle decides to claim it for a place to sit to limit the obvious fact of his loserhood. He avoids the lake where most of the campers flock together like birds, figuring it to be the ‘popular’ kid zone. And bleugh. He’s sick of all the social shit anyway. He just wishes he brought more books, because the few he snuck might not be enough to survive.</p><p>He dreads dinner time as it fast approaches and the sky darkens to an orange hue outside. The cafeteria is notorious as a huge hoax to set up groups and social tiers, and Kyle knows this all too well from school, where he lacks friends and skips the dumb option to sit at a table alone and be targeted. And he might have to see kids from his class and converse with them. The last thing he needs is for them to remind him too.</p><p>So he keeps his head down and collects his meal as fast as he can and gets the hell out of there. As he wishes it worked out that easily.</p><p>Kyle’s plan bombs when he fails to realise he took up the line for his meal right behind Stan fucking Marsh. He doesn’t even notice at first, too caught up in his own thoughts. It’s the hair that does it. That gorgeous motherfucking hair he became infatuated with the moment he saw it. And once he makes the connection it’s too late, and Stan has already turned and noticed him too, and oh fuckity fuck.</p><p>‘’Oh- hey dude!’’ Stan smiles and turns to Kyle, as they shuffle up in the line.</p><p>‘’Oh- hey Stan,’’ Kyle tries to sound casual and not panicking internally. ‘’Nice to see you again.’’</p><p>‘’Yeah!’’ Stan says enthusiastically, grinning sheepishly when he hears his own overexcitement. ‘’Are you liking camp so far?’’</p><p>‘’It’s- fine,’’ Kyle chooses to say, instead of his real answer, which is more on the lines of sucking balls. ‘’I haven’t met my cabin-mates yet.’’</p><p>‘’Really? I got put with Butters and these two quiet guys. One was like really shaky- I thought it was just nerves. And one wouldn’t speak to us at all.’’</p><p>‘’Hmm, that reminds me of some kids I know,’’ Kyle remarks, not really thinking about it.</p><p>‘’Yeah- I’m just glad I’m with someone I know, Butters isn’t so bad,’’ Stan says, rubbing the back of his neck. ‘’Are you actually gonna come to the lake tonight with us? Or were you just saying that. Because I get it- you don’t know us. It’s weird, I dunno.’’</p><p>Kyle’s finds Stan’s bumbling awkwardness too endearing to stand, so he can’t act like a jackass here. He has a habit of doing that.</p><p>‘’I mean- yeah,’’ Kyle makes a point to look out to the cafeteria where kids start to fill up with their meals while they wait. ‘’It was really nice of you, and I’m flattered. I’m just- I don’t know yet.’’</p><p>He isn’t sure if he wants to put himself through this, knowing exactly the torturous unrequited pain lined up.</p><p>‘’It’s okay!’’ Stan says nervously, like he was forcing Kyle in any way. ‘’I just thought I’d offer- I’d like to make friends here, I guess.’’</p><p>‘’I’m not the friendliest person, I’m afraid,’’ Kyle says, avoiding eye contact again. ‘’Sorry- I don’t mean to be rude-‘’</p><p>‘’No no- I get it,’’ Stan smiles easily again. ‘’But- you know, if you still wanna come. We’ll be at the lake at 11pm. I hope you do though.’’ He looks at Kyle with those blue eyes, splitting brain cells into mush.</p><p>And that’s it, Kyle’s done. He’s thrown through a loop and left a mess with no morals, already enslaved.</p><p>‘’Um, okay. I will then,’’ Kyle says, finally looking at Stan. Stan beams, and it’s slightly contagious.</p><p>‘’Wanna come sit with us? There’s still some people you should meet,’’ Stan offers.</p><p>‘’Alright,’’ Kyle says hesitantly, not sure what the fuck he’s doing and digging himself into. Oh well, too late.</p><p>They collect their trays of dinner and Stan leads Kyle to the long table apparently already occupied by the Fairplay group.</p><p>‘’Hi again Kyle!’’ Butters beams happily, waving openly when they sit down, Kyle beside Stan. Around them are Token and a new girl with striking candy red hair, ‘’Oh boy, a new friend already fellas!’’</p><p>‘’Well hello again Kylo-Ren,’’ Kenny announces, sitting at the end of the table.</p><p>‘’Aren’t you a counsellor? Isn’t there special areas for you guys to eat?’’ Kyle asks in confusion.</p><p>‘’Yeah, but I’m on duty, and every big table needs a supervisor so orgies don’t spontaneously occur,’’ Kenny grins.</p><p>‘’Sick dude,’’ Stan laughs, giving Kyle an apologetic look. Kyle is only mildly alarmed, he’s heard enough of Kenny today alone to expect this kind of stuff.</p><p>‘’Would that really happen?’’ Butters asks in fear, rubbing his knuckles a little in concern.</p><p>‘’Nah dude- Kenny’s being an asshole again,’’ Stan says, waving him off.</p><p>‘’Who’s this?’’ the pretty redheaded girl asks, directing it as Kyle, he realises.</p><p>‘’This is Kyle, Kenny met him earlier. Kyle, this is Rebecca, but everyone calls her Red,’’ Stan says. ‘’Kyle will be coming later tonight too.’’</p><p>‘’Will he now?’’ Kenny asks with a smirk, raising his eyebrows at Kyle like he’s supposed to understand what he’s insinuating. Kyle just nods and looks down.</p><p>‘’He doesn’t talk much,’’ the girl observes, a little rudely, but whatever.</p><p>‘’Well Token doesn’t either but he’s still welcome here!’’ Butters says defensively. Token perks up in surprise.</p><p>‘’What am I supposed to contribute here? Hi Kyle,’’ Token waves to him anyway, and Kyle returns it awkwardly.</p><p>‘’Well it wouldn’t hurt mister!’’ Butters says.</p><p>‘’Where’s Wendy?’’ Stan asks, and Kyle remembers him mentioning her. Maybe she’s his girlfriend. Kyle sort of hopes that’s true, though it was also be mildly crushing and disappointing.</p><p>‘’I don’t know, I saw her earlier and she’s been making friends with this other girl who looks fine as fuck,’’ Kenny says.</p><p>‘’Really? What’s she look like?’’ Butters asks curiously.</p><p>‘’Like, blonde, big boobs, curvy in a hot way. The usual shit.’’</p><p>Kyle thinks for a second he knows who’s they’re talking about, but he doesn’t want to blurt out any names in case he’s wrong and looks like a dumbass. There’s probably tons of hot blonde girls at camp anyway.</p><p>‘’Did you catch her name?’’ Stan asks.</p><p>‘’Wendy said her name’s Bebe. Sexy right?’’</p><p>Kyle chokes on his spit, though he’s not sure why. But Bebe is definitely too rare a name to be shared with any other chick here with the same features. ‘’I know Bebe.’’</p><p>‘’What?’’ Stan, Kenny and Butters say at once.</p><p>‘’She’s in my class in South Park,’’ Kyle says, feeling more awkward the longer their attention lingers on him. He starts picking at his food to distract from it.</p><p>‘’What’s she like? Is she cool? Does she have a boyfriend?’’ Kenny and Butters ask in a flurry.</p><p>‘’Um, no she’s single,’’ Kyle says, remembering those old suspicion he’d had about her, maybe like a year ago. He wouldn’t say anything unless he knew for real. He’d be dead if he shared any conspiracies about his classmates that just tolerated him to begin with. ‘’And yeah, she’s pretty cool.’’</p><p>‘’Are you into her?’’ Stan asks with a smile. Kyle has to laugh before he stutters.</p><p>‘’Um, no dude, I’m not,’’ Kyle says.</p><p>‘’Lucky for me. ‘Cause I’ll be snatching that ass up,’’ Kenny says evilly.</p><p>‘’Be careful Kenny,’’ Butters warns. ‘’Women are lying snakes in the grass- she might be infected.’’</p><p>Kenny laughs hard and slaps Butters’ back, creating a surprised noise out of him.</p><p>‘’So Kyle,’’ Red says, leaning her chin on her hand, directing his attention away from them. ‘’What do you find attractive in a girl?’’</p><p>Kyle’s throat lost function, and he coughed in an attempt to regain it.</p><p>‘’Jesus Red, you don’t ask that shit straight up,’’ Stan laughed. ‘’I need you to know we’re not this weird,’’ he says to Kyle.</p><p>‘’Ha-ha,’’ Kyle breaks a sweat. ‘’Well- you know, typically girls. Um, with hair and boobs- and stuff.’’</p><p>‘’Yes- he’s talking my language!’’ Kenny exclaims, reaching over to hi five Kyle. Kyle accepts hesitantly.</p><p>‘’Yeah-but like,’’ Red flips her shoulder length red hair. ‘’Do you like other girls with red hair?’’</p><p>Kyle could tell what she’s doing, already puzzled with complications. Maybe he should just go and date her and be done with it. He didn’t even wanna deal with his own red hair, let alone anyone else’s.</p><p>‘’Seriously?’’ Token gives Red a look, and she scoffs and pouts.</p><p>Kyle just turns back to his food, choosing not to answer. He’d just mess it up and end up offending someone, probably. Sadly, this group has been so nice and welcoming that he can’t just act like a dick out of nowhere. He can feel Stan looking at him, and Kyle’s cheeks get hot.</p><p>Before they say anything else, a girl with black hair crashes onto the table.</p><p>‘’Red! What are you doing here- I’m over with the other girls,’’ she says, jostling Red from over her shoulder.</p><p>‘’Wendy!’’ Stan says, turning his attention. ‘’Meet Kyle,’’ he gestures to Kyle.</p><p>‘’Hi,’’ Kyle can definitely understand now, Wendy is a rare beauty in her own right, delicate asymmetrical face, smartly dressed. He wonders if the group here is into her. Stan in particular. He would not be surprised. Not at all.</p><p>‘’Hey Kyle- where are you from?’’ Wendy asks.</p><p>‘’South Park,’’ Kyle says.</p><p>‘’South Park!’’ Wendy says excitedly. ‘’I just met a group from there! Do you know Bebe?’’ Wendy asks, beaming.</p><p>‘’Uh, yes,’’ Kyle answers.</p><p>‘’Oh yay! Well good news guys, I’ve invited the South Parkers to go to the lake tonight with us,’’ Wendy announces. ‘’You can come too Kyle!’’</p><p>‘’We already invited him,’’ Stan notifies her.</p><p>‘’Oh- well, can’t wait to see you there Kyle. Red- <em>c’mon</em>!’’ Wendy forcibly pulls Red up as she shouts complaint, and they leave as loud as they entered. Kyle is left visibly shook like a deer. He can’t go now- not if his classmates are coming too. Fuck.</p><p>‘’Wendy’s a force of nature,’’ Kenny explains. ‘’You get used to it. But not too used to it. She’s got Stan whipped.’’</p><p>Kyle glances at Stan, and he laughs and waves Kenny off.</p><p>‘’Um, Stan,’’ Kyle says quietly when the others are distracted. ‘’I don’t think I can go now.’’</p><p>‘’Huh? You can’t go, <em>again</em>?’’ Stan looks so disappointed as he says it, that Kyle has no choice but explain to that puppy face.</p><p>‘’Look, I don’t really along with my classmates- and then they’ll all be there-‘’</p><p>‘’You could just talk to me instead?’’ Stan offers with a smile. It’s enough for Kyle to hesitate.</p><p>‘’It’s just- there’s certain people,’’ Kyle is only thinking of Cartman here, who wouldn’t hesitate to destroy everything that seems to be working out here. He would take pleasure in ruining everything, and making Stan hate Kyle all summer. ‘’It wouldn’t be pretty- trust me. I just can’t go, I’m sorry.’’</p><p>‘’How bad can they be?’’ Stan says, hurt.</p><p>‘’What’s going on?’’ Kenny asks, and it’s over.</p><p>‘’Kyle says he can’t go now,’’ Stan says. Kyle groans and hides his face in his hands.</p><p>‘’Why not Kyle?’’ Butters asks in concern.</p><p>‘’Apparently his classmates are dicks,’’ Stan says, and the change in his tone stings, though it has no reason to. Of course he fucked up.</p><p>‘’Well jesus, Wendy seems pretty gung-ho about them,’’ Kenny says.</p><p>‘’Well, sorry, but Wendy must be an idiot then,’’ Kyle spits bitterly, without thinking. <em>Oh shit</em>.</p><p>They all stop at his outburst.</p><p>Goddamit. God-fucking-dammit.</p><p>‘’Excuse me?’’ Token says in surprise. Well that’s a fucking first for him.</p><p>You know what? Fuck it.</p><p>‘’Okay- wanna know the truth?’’ Kyle says, going all for it. He’s lost these potential friends anyway, who cares anymore!</p><p>‘’Um-‘’</p><p>‘’Yes, Wendy is a HUGE idiot. Because South Park kids are fucking evil, stupid comestains on the earth. I should know- I’m one of them! Bebe? our Bebe is a huge slut! She’ll fuck any guy that buys her stuff. There’s two guys- I’m pretty sure they’re your cabin mates,’’ Kyle points to Stan and Butters. ‘’One is a notorious crackaddict. <em>YES</em>- crack addict! The other is a piece of shit who thinks he’s better than everyone, and will not hesitate to screw anyone over to get what he wants. Oh and don’t let me forget the piece of resistance,’’ Kyle glares out to all of their faces of shock. ‘’The fattest comestain of all! Eric Cartman, the sociopathic killer, sexist, racist, antisemitic bucket of shit you will ever meet. He has tried to <em>murder</em> me over six times for being Jewish! Oh did I forget to mention that to you? Yes, that’s me. Kyle Broflovski, the skinny nerdy Jew with diabetes. Congratu-fucking-lations on your friends choices! They were obviously marvellous.’’</p><p>The table is rendered silent with shock. Kyle finally calms down, but still too angry to intensely regret his choices. He will definitely be targeted by his class. Maybe he could go home early if he breaks his arm being beaten up. That’s his best chance now.</p><p>‘’Dude,’’ Stan touches his shoulder. Kyle is too surprised by him willing to touch him at all after that outburst, to be annoyed by it. ‘’It’s okay.’’</p><p>‘’Okay?’’ Kyle asks, ‘’Oh I see, you all think I’m mentally unstable now. Fair justice, I suppose.’’ He curls into himself when their stares continue.</p><p>‘’Dude,’’ Kenny is laughing, and when the fuck did that happen? ‘’Are you kidding me- that was awesome!’’</p><p>‘’Huh?’’</p><p>‘’Oh boy, that was intense,’’ Butters says nervously. Token just raises his eyebrows.</p><p>Stan is smiling when Kyle turns back to him asking for an explanation for why these weirdos don’t look like they hate him. Kyle gets a little weirded out himself by it.</p><p>‘’Kyle,’’ Stan grins. ‘’If you thought we were normal or special, I’m sorry. We obviously didn’t introduce ourselves properly.’’</p><p>‘’What-‘’</p><p>‘’Kyle, meet Kenny,’’ Stan says, presenting Kenny like a showhost, who sticks his tongue out. ‘’He is the horniest, nymphomaniac on the planet, and he will fuck anything that moves. He laughs at others pain, and laughs even harder at their sexual frustration. You will wake up with dicks drawn on your face if you share a room with him.’’</p><p>Kyle turns to Kenny, who doesn’t look angry at all, just grins and winks at Kyle.</p><p>‘’Kyle, meet Butters,’’ Kenny says, adopting the same presenting gesture like a theme.</p><p>‘’Oh jeez, my turn,’’ Butters says.</p><p>‘’Butters is my complete opposite,’’ Kenny continues. ‘’You will never meet a boy pretending to be a teen more sexually virginal than Butters. He refuses to refuse his parents, and is their willing slave. He will also wear the badge of punching bag to anyone who goes the effort to punch him. Because he’s just too easy a target they get bored. He will also get payback in the most twistedly moral way possible if you mess with him, because God has a boner for getting revenge for this <em>LITERAL ANGEL-</em>‘’</p><p>‘’Kenny- we’re talking about our flaws,’’ Stan reprimands.</p><p>‘’Right, right,’’ Kenny chuckles.</p><p>‘’Uh, okay jeez, I guess I’ve gotta talk about Token,’’ Butters says nervously. ‘’Don’t be sore with me Token.’’</p><p>‘’It’s fine,’’ Token says.</p><p>‘’Um, well. Token is our rich kid. Like- really really rich. He’s a bit of a pussy too- cos this one time he couldn’t handle us ripping on him and tried to get these other rich kids to be friends with instead. And he’s also a pussy because he won’t fight back when he’s made fun of. He’ll just go and put up with it- saying a little pussy response that don’t mean nothing.’’</p><p>‘’Ha-<em>ha</em>! Yes Butters!’’ Kenny cheers, clapping.</p><p>‘’Oh jeez,’’ Butter curls in on himself, blushing.</p><p>‘’Okay, well,’’ Token shakes his head, apparently only mildly uncomfortable. ‘’Let’s talk about Stan now.’’</p><p>-Kyle is particularly interested in this part.</p><p>‘’Go for it dude,’’ Stan smirks.</p><p>‘’Okay,’’ Token grins. ‘’Let’s start off with his love life?’’</p><p>‘’Low blow Token, I am <em>loving</em> this,’’ Kenny says.</p><p>‘’His one and only love- meant to be forever, his first kiss, first girlfriend. The one and only <em>Wendy Testaburger</em>. She says she loves him, then leaves him for myself. Only to leave me for him again, which he takes her back like that, pussy whipped to her command. No matter how bad she hurts him. No matter how many times she breaks his heart over nothing special, or the new good looking guy she takes interest in. And how does he react? Oh not much, <em>alcoholism</em> is apparently a common thing these days in teens. The cynical nihilist of the hour is just another drunk heartbroken sucker. Was this a double roast on them both? Yes it was,’’ Token finishes, clearly satisfied with himself.</p><p>‘’Dude,’’ Kenny says. ‘’Harsh.’’</p><p>Token shrugs.</p><p>Kyle looks to how Stan reacted, half expecting him to either beat up Token or storm away from the table. To his surprise, Stan is stifling a laugh, biting his fist.</p><p>‘’I would sure be sore if someone said that to me,’’ Butters unnecessarily comments.</p><p>‘’Um, okay,’’ Stan is still mildly giggling as he speaks. ‘’You’ve roasted the fuck out of me- that’s fair. I had it coming. Uh- Kyle. I’m not with Wendy anymore, though- so it’s cool. And I hope- <em>pfft</em>, hope you get now that we’re nothing close to wholesome friends, and you’re kind of getting what you had before. So don’t worry about it dude, we’re all fucked up.’’</p><p>‘’Jesus,’’ Kyle says, looking down. Okay, so he’ll shut the fuck up next time. The revelations about Stan still have him in a loop.</p><p>‘’And we’re meeting these other fucked up specimens tonight, so I have a feeling we’re all gonna get along just fine. Except for Eric Cartman- he sounds like a douchebag.’’</p><p>‘’Agreed,’’ Token says.</p><p>‘’Oh boy, yes,’’ Butters adds.</p><p>‘’Seriously, fuck that guy,’’ Stan says. ‘’Soo- are we cool? You’re gonna come tonight?’’</p><p>‘’I don’t see how I have a choice now,’’ Kyle says, fiddling with his hands anxiously.</p><p>‘’Hey- we’ll take it!’’ Kenny exclaims. Kyle glances at Stan again, not completely sure he could trust them yet. He’s slightly impressed at their realism with each other, despite all.</p><p>Stan gives him a hopeful look, and that’s all Kyle needs to ignore his own rational brain. So, he’s going to the lake tonight.</p><p>Hurray.</p><p>**</p><p>The rest of the dinner went fine, but Kyle was distracted. The fairplay group agreed they’d sneak out half an hour after lights out. After Kyle said which cabin he was staying in, Stan said he’d meet Kyle and they’d head to the lake together. Kyle had nodded and tried not to show on his face his surprised delight.</p><p>No, no. Stop that. Enough.                   </p><p>But when Kyle returned to his cabin to set away his bags to his bunk, he realised he’d have to explain to his cabin-mates what he’s doing crawling out of bed after lights out. He’ll probably have to lie to them, or they might want to come or rat them out.</p><p>That issue becomes irrelevant when he enters said cabin and it remains as empty as it did when he first checked it out. There’s no bags anywhere, so they haven’t just gone outside or anything. Kyle starts to fluster about what this means. Where the fuck are they? What’s supposed to happen now?</p><p>There’s not much to do now. The counsellors advised the campers to get to know each other the first night after dinner, in lieu of planning some fireside activity. Kyle wondered if he should just leave, but curfew was ending soon, and the only excuses for being out would be going to the restrooms.</p><p>He tried to imagine what Stan must be doing with Butters and their two cabin-mates Kyle was certain were Tweek and Craig. Those two had pretty distinctive personalities, and it was fair fucking justice they be paired into the same cabin. They had better luck than Kyle did, whom was starting to look like he’d been left out completely and forgotten to a lone cabin where he can wallow alone for three months.</p><p>Kyle wouldn’t mind that so much, but it was just the lack of efficiency on camp’s part that bugs him.</p><p>Kyle pushes away his unease about the way the situation is looking, and no one arriving, making him fairly certain they either ran out of campers of forgot to put him in with anyone else.</p><p>Deciding to pack away his embarrassing amount of bags in his bunk on one of the bottom bunks, Kyle tries to distract himself with organising. He’ll have nothing to do here for an hour, so Kyle makes the presidential decision to make this cabin look nicer. That’ll start with ditching those disgusting, <em>disgusting</em> green curtains. Kyle wakes up early, and he likes the sun on him, so they won’t be necessary on the one window in the room.</p><p>He keeps his stuff in one neat section organised by activity at the foot of his bunk, keeping it in a small section just in case.</p><p>It occurs to him while he improves the cabin that he should inform one of the counsellors that he’s all alone. But then again, they might go and put him in a different cabin with random kids, and he actually prefers this right now. It might have begun as a sore burn, has turned into his own advantage.</p><p>Even better considering he can jerk off in here without disruption or angst. Kyle can only imagine what the other campers might be thinking. A camp half full of horny teenager boys? They’ve already deliberated endlessly over it, he’s certain. Surely they wouldn’t do it around their cabin-mates asleep in the same room. They’d probably resort to doing it quickly in the showers, masked by the pattering water on tiles. Fucking gross.</p><p>Kyle decides to listen to music before his mind drifts to that cute-smiled, black-haired motherfucker again. Imagining that he’d have no choice but to beat off in the showers, doing it quickly and quietly- making a little sighing noise at the relief. Maybe a slight groan at the pressure release-</p><p>Shut up. No, stop.</p><p>Kyle digs for his phone and earplugs to get it out of his mind. Flopping onto his bed, he stares at the roof of his bunk, the wooden slats creating lines in his eyes. He puts on a playlist, and lets his mind drift.</p><p>Kyle has drifted off to a light sleep by the time he hears the knock on his cabin door. Startled awake, Kyle’s chest beats hard at the tapping sound, his half-asleep mind terrified.</p><p>‘’Kyle? You in there? Is this the right cabin?’’</p><p>Looking around and remembering where he is, Kyle throws himself out of bed and brushes his crumpled slept-in clothes down, and leaps to the door. Heart thudding even harder at the rush of movement, his blood is moving fast when he opens the door way too overexcitedly at Stan, who looks taken aback.</p><p>Kyle reels himself in then, flushing.</p><p>‘’Hey, you ready to go?’’ Stan whispers, glancing around him as if not to disturb his cabin mates. Kyle smiles sheepishly.</p><p>‘’Yeah, let’s go.’’</p><p>Kyle had half expected Stan to bring along someone like Butters or Kenny, but he’s come alone. They walk through the now dark pathway leading to the lake. The moon acts as their light for the time being, bright enough to illuminate the place softly.</p><p>‘’Did you meet your cabin-mates?’’ Stan asks as they tred through the dirt.</p><p>‘’Um- no,’’ Kyle laughs nervously. ‘’So, I guess they forgot about me, because I’ve been put in a cabin by myself it seems.’’</p><p>‘’Seriously?’’ Stan asks. ‘’Damn, that sounds lucky.’’</p><p>‘’I guess,’’ Kyle shrugs, his clothes itchy when he thinks about the masturbation perk again. Then he forces himself to think of anything else when Stan slides a smile his way.</p><p>‘’Butters tried to make friends with our cabin mates- those guys you said might be in your class,’’ Stan says.</p><p>‘’Oh yeah?’’</p><p>‘’Yeah, you’re kind of right that they’re kinda weird,’’ Stan says, laughing and rubbing his neck. ‘’Sorry, that sounds mean.’’</p><p>‘’It’s true though right? They’re pretty weird. But I guess that’s desirable in my town, because they’re quite popular,’’ Kyle says. ‘’More than I am, to be honest.’’</p><p>‘’Now I think your town is really weird,’’ Stan grins. ‘’Who wouldn’t like you? I do.’’</p><p>‘’Ha, asshole,’’ Kyle laughs, blushes.</p><p>‘’No- I’m serious!’’ Stan smiles, walking ahead of Kyle to grin at him. ‘’You had the balls to stand up and talk shit about Wendy, and your own crew. I thought that was pretty cool.’’</p><p>‘’Really? I thought it was kind of petty,’’ Kyle says.</p><p>‘’Why?’’</p><p>‘’I’m just been pissed off lately I guess,’’ Kyle shrugs, not really wanting to get into it, even to Stan here. Who’s he’s frightened by how relaxed he feels by his side.</p><p>‘’How come?’’</p><p>‘’Hah, I doubt you’d care.’’</p><p>‘’Noo!’’ Stan stops Kyle, smiling warmly. ‘’Look at my face, see how much I care.’’</p><p>Kyle really doesn’t want to look at Stan’s face any more than he has to, because it’s just dragging him deeper.</p><p>‘’Okay, fine. You care,’’ Kyle playfully shoves Stan, and he chuckles as they keep walking. Kyle can see the shimmer of the lake now.</p><p>‘’Just let me know when you wanna tell me dude,’’ Stan says, and Kyle agrees to. He doubts he ever will, but who knows.</p><p>By the time they get to the lake, most of both groups seem to have arrived already, and all of Kyle’s classmates are indeed there, looking like they’ve never been apart from the Fairplay kids. Kyle’s anxiety while he stares doubles down on him, and suddenly he refuses to leave Stan’s side. All night.</p><p>He won’t survive any other way.</p><p>The girls seem to be swimming, apparently not handing out the memo that swimming would be involved. Kyle wouldn’t have swum anyway. His hair would be fucked.</p><p>He spots Clyde and Jimmy in the water with the girls, and go figure.</p><p>Stan and Kyle head over to the main circle, where Kenny is telling everyone a story. Tweek and Craig are there, along with Butters and Token. Kyle spots Cartman beside them, and subtly hides himself from view behind Stan, hoping to delay an altercation for as long as possible.</p><p>‘’Okay okay, so then I talk to the other counsellors, and Mindy says-‘’ Kenny says.</p><p>‘’This story sucks balls,’’ Cartman yawns, stretching his arms out.</p><p>‘’Go home then tubby,’’ Kenny quips. ‘’I can report you and get you sent to bed.’’</p><p>‘’Then you’d have to report everyone retard,’’ Cartman says. ‘’Would you spoil everyone’s good time for the sake of your lame story Keeny?’’</p><p>‘’So you must be Cartman,’’ Stan says, looking unimpressed. Cartman turns to him, sneering, and Kyle breathes relief when Cartman fail to notice him.</p><p>‘’Who’s this fag?’’ Cartman says.</p><p>‘’That’s Stan fatass,’’ Kyle pipes in loudly, unable to stop himself from opening his stupid mouth. Everyone looks at him, and he tries not to curl in again. Cartman takes one look at him and his mouth curls into a cruel smirk.</p><p>‘’Well, well, <em>well</em>. Who knew you were crawling out of your Jew cave for camp <em>Kahl</em>?’’ Cartman says. Kyle seethes, kicking himself for speaking up. It’s just the word Cartman used for Stan, triggered him too much to remain quiet. ‘’Did you find yourself a new boyfriend already?’’ Cartman slid his sadistic gaze to Stan and smiled.</p><p>‘’What’s your problem asshole?’’ Stan stepped in, crossing his arms.</p><p>‘’Woah! You guys, Kahl actually got the talking model blowup sex doll for summer camp. Aww.’’</p><p>‘’Fuck you!’’ Kyle yelled, fisting his hands to stop himself from leaping at him. Just as he predicted, Cartman was ruining this already. He didn’t even get a fucking day.</p><p>‘’Surely he hasn’t told you guys yet that he makes out with the guy teachers all day, just like the homo he is.’’</p><p>‘’Hey hey-‘’ Kenny started.</p><p>‘’<em>Argh</em>- fucking die!’’ Kyle screamed, the only thing holding him back from beating his fat head in was Stan, who held his shoulders back.</p><p>‘’Careful Stan. Kyle gets cranky when he’s got sand in his vagina,’’ Cartman preened, getting curses from Kyle, who felt like exploding.</p><p>‘’Woah okay,’’ Stan said, pulling Kyle back. Kyle only went back willingly when Stan stepped forward and came over to Cartman. He had about four inches over the fucker.</p><p>Then bam! Out of nowhere, Stan punched Cartman right in the nose and the power of it knocked him to the ground. Cartman squealed and held his bloody nose, and everyone exclaimed shock around the scene. Kyle stared at Cartman’s now limp crying body on the sand.</p><p>And fell in love with Stan.</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>You can hate me for the sinfully long time it took to update, it's okay 🤡</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p>‘’Woah okay!’’ Kenny exclaims, stepping between the scene to break it up. Cartman stays on the ground, and Stan steps back, breathing heavily.</p><p>‘’Shit,’’ Stan says under his breath, looking shocked. Kyle stares at the whining heap curled up on the ground, tracing his heart back to acceptable beating levels, fists clenching and unclenching as he accepts what’s happening to him. ‘‘I didn’t mean to hit him that hard,’’ Stan admits guiltily to the group, which is currently varying between obscene laughter and shock.</p><p>‘’Don’t worry about it dude,’’ Kenny waves Stan off, inspecting the lump. ‘’You didn’t, this fatso must be just a little bitch.’’</p><p>‘’Fuck you Keeny,’’ Cartman mewled out, cradling his nose.</p><p>Stan looks back at Kyle- somehow giving him a look of regret. Kyle is baffled. This is obviously the single sexiest thing that he’s seen in his life.</p><p>‘’D-don’t-‘’ Kyle actually chokes on his spit. ‘’Don’t worry about it.’’</p><p>‘’Dude that was fucking hardcore,’’ Clyde appears, dripping wet in swimming trunks. He must have gotten the memo. Beside him stands an equally dripping Bebe leaning on him less than platonically.</p><p>‘’He was being an asshole- but I didn’t mean to- sorry.’’</p><p>‘’Don’t apologise!’’ Clyde laughs. ‘’He’s a dick, its about time someone did it.’’</p><p>Stan glances at Kyle again for confirmation, but Kyle can barely maintain eye contact right now, frozen in place.</p><p>‘’You must be Stan,’’ Clyde says. ‘’Good to meet you bro, I’m Clyde.’’</p><p>‘’Oh- right. Hi dude.’’</p><p>‘’Aren’t you going to introduce me?’’ Bebe asks, looking Stan up and down. Kyle knows her very well, and exactly what she’s thinking; <em>Man meat</em>. Kyle can’t really blame her.</p><p>‘’You must be Bebe,’’ Stan says with a grin. ‘’My friend Wendy has been gushing about you.’’</p><p>‘’Wendy!’’ Bebe beams, then turns coy. ‘’I love her, she’s so cool. We’ll probably be camp best friends.’’</p><p>‘’Damn, why don’t you guys just get married,’’ Clyde teases, and gets hit in the shoulder.</p><p>‘’Did I hear my name!’’ a voice calls out, and in the same flurry she appeared at the cafeteria table, Wendy appears, grinning wide and hair somehow still sleek and perfect. <em>She</em> is perfect, which Kyle continues to feel irritated about. Standing here at the lake late at night- shivering and wishing to go back to his cabin, close to Stan but largely ignored in the conversation. It feels just like school.</p><p>The next 15 seconds are an exhausting exchange of happy and overbearing friendliness from Wendy and Bebe, shot to each other, caught, and slung back with hugs and if it were possible, emoji kisses blown over their heads. They talk animatedly like they hadn’t just spoken this fucking afternoon.</p><p>Kyle feels the need to exit from this conversation, and wonders how the hell to do it without looking like a jackass, when a Stan-shaped blessing gifts itself to him right there.</p><p>‘’Hey, wanna escape with me?’’ Stan asks with a chuckle. Kyle grabs his arm without another thought and they saunter away as calmly as they can manage to look without just running like children.</p><p>It’s an instant relief to be out of the nucleus of the large gathering, who all talk way too loudly, apparently not giving a fuck anymore if they’re heard by the counsellors. He and Stan walk to the edge of the dark shimmering lake, far enough away that Kyle can finally let out that breath he was holding. Then he takes another deep troubling one, because now he’s officially alone with Stan, for the first time.</p><p>‘’So that was something,’’ Stan says first, breaking their silence. The water laps at the shore close to where they sit. Kyle keeps his knees pulled defensively up at his chest. Stan is cross legged, staring out at the lake only illuminated by the moon.</p><p>‘’You get used to him,’’ Kyle says, sighing out. He certainly hasn’t yet, and he’s known Cartman since preschool.</p><p>‘’I’m sorry I did that- I swear I didn’t mean to-‘’ Stan is still worried about this, clutching Kyle’s arm. Kyle stutters a breath and laughs.</p><p>‘’Stan- that was amazing okay, I’m so impressed- in fact I’m jealous I didn’t do it first.’’</p><p>‘’I can’t imagine you not getting a hit in all this time,’’ Stan finally smiles.                                 </p><p>‘’Oh I have, but it never seems to count to people when I knock him out,’’ Kyle admits.</p><p>‘’Bullshit, lets go hit him again and I’ll count it.’’</p><p>Kyle grins at him, looking and noticing Stan’s pinkened cheeks, his deepened perfect smile. His eyes look tired, but reflect the moonshine anyway. He’s fucking screwed, utterly screwed. So screwed he might as well be nailed right now.</p><p>‘’So I guess you’ve met my crew now,’’ Kyle says instead of acknowledging his doom any longer. ‘’I mentioned they’re horrible right?’’</p><p>‘’Yeah, you might have mentioned something,’’ Stan jokes. ‘’I don’t know, it feels like we all know each other already- it’s weird.’’</p><p>‘’I noticed that too. I don’t know if I like the idea.’’</p><p>‘’Why not?’’</p><p>‘’Well, I’m not really well liked amongst my own anyway, I could do without more ignoring my existence.’’</p><p>Stan scoffs and shakes his head. ‘’I think you’re wrong- we’ve got Kenny, and Butters and Wendy. And hey- I’m here, I’m sitting at a camp side lake with you, and- um- we could hang out this summer, if you want.’’</p><p>‘’You’d regret making that kind of statement,’’ Kyle says dejectedly, digging his finger into the sand.</p><p>‘’Hey- dude,’’ Stan quite literally forces Kyle to look at him, grabbing his chin and holding it with two fingers. Kyle widens his eyes and loses his voice, breathing heavily. ‘’I wouldn’t regret spending even a second with you, and I want to <em>know</em> you.’’</p><p>Kyle can see the visible frustration on Stan’s face, his eyebrows creasing like he doesn’t understand why Kyle can’t get this. Kyle’s face is beet red- being this close, and reality only sets in when Kyle smells the light but distinct smell of alcohol on Stan’s breath.</p><p>‘’Oh,’’ so everything makes sense now, that punch, this weird tenderness that makes Kyle lose himself in those eyes. Foolish- it’s all foolish, Stan is merely being what drunks are: reckless with no intent.</p><p>Token told him, clear as day, and he didn’t even listen.</p><p>Stan must realise Kyle understands now, because he releases his tight grip on Kyle’s chin and leans away abruptly, suddenly horrified.</p><p>‘’Kyle-‘’</p><p>‘’No, no- it’s okay. I’ll just uh-‘’ Kyle needs to escape this situation, he can’t bear do this to himself, if he just escapes now-</p><p>‘’No- Kyle. Please, I didn’t mean-‘’</p><p>‘’This is a bad idea,’’ Kyle can’t believe he’s even mentioning that, but who cares anymore. He leans back, and begins to stand up shakily, cursing himself for having that sliver of hope. Never again.</p><p>Kyle is walking away from Stan, shivering now and turning back to go to camp, when he’s tackled to the ground. Kyle shouts in surprise, and he’s flipped over to face Stan staring down at him, pressing him to the ground.</p><p>‘’Dude!’’</p><p>‘’Just- let me explain,’’ Stan breathes shakily, holding Kyle’s shoulders in a tight grip. Any other situation and Kyle would be flipping out, but Stan’s eyes are sobering. Kyle glances around, but the group in the distance seem as oblivious as ever.</p><p>‘’Why were you drinking?’’ Kyle asks, refusing to let Stan have the first word.</p><p>‘’I just- it helps sometimes to get through stuff- like this meet. It wasn’t much though! I just had a few sips, it’s barely done anything, I’m fine.’’</p><p>‘’Would you have punched Fatass without it?’’</p><p>‘’Probably- he was insulting you,’’ Stan says seriously.</p><p>‘’Well- get used to that. That’s my life. Being harassed with gay jokes- you ready for that? That’s what you’ll get too for being around me.’’</p><p>‘’I don’t care- dude comments like that- I would trade that for hanging out with you. You’re like the only person I’ve met here I really like.’’</p><p>‘’But you’ve got your friends,’’ Kyle frowns.</p><p>‘’Those guys? I like them but they’ve got their own shit going on. Like- Kenny’s got issues, sometimes I just can’t handle listening to it all, and Butters- Jesus Christ. I’m sorry Kyle- I didn’t- I’ve fucked this up.’’</p><p>‘’Stop saying that,’’ Kyle says weakly, deflating against Stan’s arms. It’s very strange, considering where they are and what happening, that Stan only then notices how awkward their positions are. Kyle can smell his breath even closer now.</p><p>‘’Shit,’’ he says, sitting up and releasing Kyle, and collapsing back down on the sand. ‘’This is so not how I imagined my first day.’’</p><p>‘’How did you imagine it?’’ Kyle asks, watching Stan lie down beside him on the ground and look up at the night sky. His chest heaves as Stan lets out a long breath, the silhouette of his nose illuminated by moonlight. Kyle forgets to look away.</p><p>‘’I don’t know, like some awesome adventure, everyone being super nice like one big group of friends. A kickass party to kick the summer off right. And instead I fucked things up and punched your classmate.’’</p><p>‘’You still don’t understand I consider that a completely kickass way to kick the summer off right. You’re like my idol now,’’ Kyle didn’t mean to admit that, but Stan smiles up at the stars anyway, so he considers it a win.</p><p>‘’Nah, that’s where you’re wrong. You’re MY idol for talking shit about my class- even Wendy. Nobody’s ever been brave enough to do that.’’</p><p>‘’Well, give me a chance huh? I’ve got more up my sleeve,’’ what a complete bomb of a response, what kind of pathetic dork says something so mediocre-</p><p>‘’I wanna see it all,’’ Stan turns to him, eyes shining in something- excitement? Kyle mouth runs dry, hands twitching at his sides. ‘’I bet you’re the most interesting person in this whole camp, Kyle Broflovski.’’</p><p>‘’How do you know my last name?’’ Kyle asks instead of acknowledging that statement.</p><p>‘’Oh,’’ Stan laughs. ‘’I got Kenny to look it up on the sign-up sheets, I wanted to know more about you.’’</p><p>‘’Ha!’’ Kyle is delighted. ‘’Would you have just admitted that if you weren’t tipsy?’’</p><p>‘’<em>Maybee</em>’’ Stan grins loosely. ‘’What are you gonna do about it?’’</p><p>‘’Just hold it over you all camp,’’ Kyle returns his mischievous grin, bolstered and titchy with a thrill in his stomach. ‘’Make you be my partner for all the canoeing activities.’’</p><p>‘’Aww- but I thought we were already gonna do that?’’ Stan pouts, putting it on. ‘’You should force me to do something like- <em>bad.</em>’’</p><p>Kyle can think of millions of bad things Stan could do, which he will never say out loud if a fucking gun was held to his head.</p><p>‘’Like what?’’ Kyle says instead.</p><p>‘’Umm,’’ Stan sits up, Kyle follows his lead. ‘’Ooh! Midnight skinny dipping.’’</p><p>‘’Fuck you, I’m not getting my dick out in that cursed monster lake.’’</p><p>Stan laughs hard, and Kyle is relaxed enough to join him sincerely. He’s surprised with himself, but this part of camp hasn’t been so bad. He won’t speak for the rest, but Stan has so far made it manageable.</p><p>Who’s he kidding. Every moment alone in Stan’s company is fucking bliss, and he doesn’t want this to end. He will bite the hand off anyone from the group who dares disrupt this moment in time. Let him wallow selfishly, indulgently, just a little longer.</p><p>‘’Okay, okay. No skinny dipping. Oh! You said your cabin is empty- lets go move the party there!’’</p><p>Kyle hesitates, really resenting the idea that <em>his</em> room (it is his now, nobody else claimed it) be desecrated by these people he mostly loathes. Besides Stan.</p><p>Maybe Kenny. But mostly loathes.</p><p>‘’I don’t really want to bring everyone there,’’ Kyle explains, about to bullshit his way through being ‘too tired’ to avoid being rude. Stan stops him before he does.</p><p>‘’I just meant me and you dude,’’ Stan smiles.</p><p>Now.</p><p>That shouldn’t have made Kyle shiver intensely down his spine. There was technically nothing risqué about it. But it has, and oh well.</p><p>‘’O-kay,’’ Kyle says, a little hypnotised by how impressed he is Stan owns his ass right now, and he probably doesn’t even realise that Kyle would fight people to continue being in the mere presence of this motherfucker.</p><p>He’s being ridiculous, but it’s been a ridiculous night, so he forgives himself for now. He’ll work on a self-preservation technique in the morning, to make this summer manageable when he leaves- and likely never sees this guy again. But he doesn’t want to think about that right now.</p><p>‘’What about the others?’’ Kyle asks, looking around to them. Some have reclaimed the lake, but most remain in the large circle- likely in the middle of another story. Kyle really doesn’t want to go back there, not with Cartman around sulking and ready to retaliate. Kyle really held his own growing up, but lately Cartman’s had a growth spurt, along with an influx of weight gain that have annoyingly made him a much stronger adversary, more than spaghetti armed Kyle can handle right now. He’s really slacked on his exercise lately, but the closet is a stressful place; it requires junk food to recuperate.</p><p>Stan is fit, in a way that should annoy him or make him jealous, but it doesn’t. He just really, <em>really</em> wants to lick him and taste his skin.</p><p>‘’Fuck those guys,’’ Stan announces, surprising him. ‘’We’re gonna have more fun. C’mon.’’</p><p>It really is something, allowing himself to follow Stan back to his own damn cabin, but he’s pretty used to the idea already of following this bitch wherever he calls, like a trained canine. Hopefully it just wont look obvious to the others.</p><p>Kyle is pretty tired by the time they walk back, not realising it until he walks up those two creaking steps of the cabin and they walk inside. Stan seems again shocked, like he wasn’t literally expecting it to be empty aside from Kyle’s bunk. But it is, and Kyle finds a way to feel embarrassed.</p><p>‘’So yeah, this is it,’’ like a housewife, a fucking butler escort, he sounds.</p><p>‘’It’s nice,’’ Stan says, probably lying, what does Kyle know. He’s so fucking tired, today has been draining. He would have more energy if he didn’t make that final desperate plead to his mother before they left home. He considered using coming out to get out of it, but thought better of it. It was the reason he’s here to begin with, even if his mother doesn’t know it.</p><p>‘’I didn’t really have time to unpack,’’ Kyle says to fill the silence, self-conscious of his mess. He had been too busy contemplating the modern day struggles of masturbation at summer camp, to properly unpack.</p><p>‘’Are you kidding? It’s cleaner than mine, I just threw my shit on my bed,’’ Stan chuckles, rubbing his neck.</p><p>‘’Your poor bunkmate,’’ Kyle jokes. ‘’Glad it’s not me.’’</p><p>Actually, that wouldn’t be so bad. No- scratch that. It would be living torture, hearing Stan’s soft wet sleeping sounds, getting hard over it, and having no choice but to suffer through it, mortified. He wouldn’t be able to sleep for three months.</p><p>‘’Hey- that gives me an idea,’’ Stan says, and if only metaphorical light bulbs existed. ‘’We could just room here with you without telling the counsellors, then you wouldn’t be alone. Wouldn’t that be cool?’’</p><p>And he speaks too soon.</p><p>‘’How would that work? Don’t the counsellors check on all the cabins in the morning?’’ Kyle tries to thinks logically about it, trying hard not to concede. It would be torture, it would be torture. Sweet delicious torture.</p><p>Oh fuck.</p><p>‘’We’ll get Kenny to check ours, so that we don’t get ratted out,’’ Stan says it like it’s already happening, eyes churning with excited plans. Kyle can’t resist smiling, but his stomach folds over on him. Well, there’s quite a few bunks here. Kyle would still get his own, so it wouldn’t be a big deal. It could be fun.</p><p>‘’Just imagine if we’re bunkmates,’’ Stan grins. ‘’Constant sleepover dude, how awesome is that?’’</p><p>And again, he speaks too soon.</p><p>‘’I don’t know dude,’’ Kyle says, hiding the nerves pinching up his gut in both dread and thrill. It’s a devastating combination.</p><p>‘’Oh come on- you can’t be alone at camp, the annoying crowded cabins are part of the experience,’’ Stan eggs him on. ‘’Think of it this way. I’m not letting your lucky ass get away with your own room. You have to suffer with me.’’</p><p>The knowing, pleading look is what does it. Stan knows he’s going to get his way. He knows Kyle will eat out of his hand, he’s only doing this to keep up appearances. He shouldn’t know this, but Kyle, somehow, is okay with it.</p><p>He can tell Stan is good. He wouldn’t take advantage of Kyle’s trust.</p><p>‘’Okay.’’</p><p>And there he is, saying yes again.</p><p> </p><p> </p>
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<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>huhuhhu, get fed, im spoiling you</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p>Kyle is very skilled at hiding his thoughts nowadays. Unless some handsome bitch with telekinesis comes along, he can mask anything he chooses (or needs to). He has a strong suspicion it will be very necessary here, it’s just a shame he has the strong suspicion Stan will take one look at him and know better. Because of course he does.</p><p>Kyle retires to his cabin on his own that night. As enthusiastically Stan dreamed about the idea of merging cabins, Kyle was relieved to see the back of him. If only so he could finally let out that long pent up breath clogging his lungs. It wouldn’t last, Kyle knew it would happen at some point, according to Stan he has to convince Butters to join in their plan before it can go ahead. He doesn’t understand why but didn’t complain, thankful he could get one night on his own to collect his thoughts. Which, lying in bed way past midnight (his eyes would kill him in the morning), staring up from his bottom bunk to the slats of the mattress above, they ranged as following:</p><p>
  <em>What the everliving FUCK happened? Why can’t he just act like a total asshole for one day so everyone hates him and this shit doesn’t happen? Why is this happening to him anyway- he never did anything really bad in his life- he made good choices? Why why why? He kind of hates Stan right now. But fucking hell, he likes him more. This will end in tragedy.</em>
</p><p>Sleep does not sail his way smoothly. Often he twists and turns a lot before his brain lets him shut off, but tonight he just drifts off calmly, and bleary half-formed thoughts have him hoping he’ll have a peaceful sleep. As freaking if.</p><p>He has drifting nightmares about school. It’s never good when that topic comes up, but the first few inklings of moments seem promising. The class is small, fifteen teens on a busy day, and today they’re all here. Not a single soul ditched, and Kyle is shocked. He had perfect attendance, and perfect grades, and the teachers liked him- he assumed. Why wouldn’t they?</p><p>The grade feels like one big family Kyle wasn’t adopted into. His friends are around- somewhere. Shadows with the suggestion he has friends okay. They’re just absent today. Nobody believes him, and they don’t want Kyle to punch them for that. Which he does a few times anyway, because everyone is so fucking stupid that he could scream. He does in the halls sometimes, but nobody is ever there when he does- nobody comes to comfort him or ask why he’s bitching about it. They don’t really care about him, what is he but a tag along with bad hair?</p><p>His hair in the dream is massive, clouding over the hallways like an angry red scribble, chasing away onlookers when he glares and dares them to make fun of him. That’s fine, he doesn’t want them too, but he has to walk carefully, the weight on his head is prone to tilting and if he’s pushed by some fat asshole behind him he’ll fall. <em>That</em> fat asshole, is nowhere to be found in the halls either, which are suddenly painfully empty and dry like a corpse. Kyle starts running, the shadow of those ‘friends’ caused by the massive jew-fro eat the scene up like they don’t care he’s still in it. He trips over the unbalanced weight and falls into darkness.</p><p>Rollback. He’s still in the dark but he can see- no, <em>feel</em> everything around him. He’s in someone’s living room. The standard South Park interior design, hideous and comforting and familiar, and Kyle is so familiar with this particular living room. Ah, there his classmates are, toasting drinks in red plastic cups- Cartman stands above them on a shadow of a pedestal, towering and booming out to their snickers that he finally convinced Kyle to suck his balls, and he knew fucking all along what a fag he was, taunting it out to the air where Kyle stands. He can’t see Kyle- he doesn’t recognise him standing there, this party was in his honour but he wasn’t invited. Kyle squirms uncomfortably and loses the air around him to breathe. Black again.</p><p>Rollback. Rollback. Black again with the hints of thoughts swimming around him, but he still can’t see- only feel. It’s freezing, but wait-</p><p>Kyle wakes up in a spasm and blinks his eyes open to a dark empty room. The slats above his vision are real, woody and dewy looking, they split into multiples when Kyle stares so hard his eyes cross and blur.</p><p>Observation from around him; he’s still in the cabin, alone like in the dream. His chest is beating so hard, it pumps away as he lays stiff across the creaky mattress. His forehead is overly hot, sweltering, but he’s freezing. His blankets were kicked off in his sleep, abandoned to the floor that feels way too far away.</p><p>Once Kyle regulates his heartbeat, he pulls himself down to feel for his blanket (unzipped sleeping bag more accurately, this isn’t a hotel), and tugs it back from the ground to cover himself, shivering and hiding his face. Smells overly sprayed down, something vaguely campy- pun intended. He’s covered in a layer of dried sweat, which will make him feel really really gross soon. He didn’t get to shower last night.</p><p>After another evaluation- it was just a fucking dream get a hold of yourself. It’s actually early morning, and Kyle is still exhausted and wide awake when the first trickling of sunlight creeps into the high little windows in the room. He tries to sleep again- but too much is on his mind and he’ll be damned if he closes his eyes to willingly go back to that hellscape.</p><p>He lets himself dwell fruitlessly for a few minutes more, then gives up and gets out of bed. Curse the freezing ass floorboards at the asscrack of dawn, he’s got a scowl on his face as he dresses. It’ll heat up today- definitely, but it’s cold enough this morning (barely morning) to require his hoodie. It doesn’t fit over his atrocity of curls as well as his ushanka used to- but that old thing stopped fitting in sixth grade, and his hood will have to make do. He’s thinking about those hair dreams as he sneaks out the door with caution, pretty certain it’s unallowed to be out this early. He does check once before he goes- just in case, that his hair isn’t the size of a house.</p><p>The campsite looks near abandoned this early in the morning. Not a noise or camper in sight, the grounds are desolate and trash piles the common areas from the busy first day of packing. Apparently messes aren’t cleaned up immediately here, which is another good reason to wrinkle his nose in disgust. His mother surely knew this would be hell for him- cleanliness alone. Did she not care?</p><p>He’s certain she just didn’t care. But he guesses that’s what he gets for throwing menorahs through windows.</p><p>It feels illegal for him to be outside yet- the others wouldn’t even be awake for an hour or two at least. Kyle had no idea where to go- just didn’t want to be in the dark daunting room again. The omnipresent glitter of the lake is taunting, and he figures it out seconds after observation of the grounds that it’s the only place worth heading to in this forest in the middle of bumfuck. The rest of camp is littered already, he’ll take a haunted monster lake over it any day.</p><p>He never did get a good look at the lake yesterday during unpacking- or the midnight frenzy for that matter. It was too dark to gaze at more than the reflection of the moon, so to find the lake in all it’s wide brimming glory early dawn, is a sight to behold.</p><p>The large water source is bordered with conifer trees at each shore, creating a wall of sorts out of dark majestic pines that corner the place like a battle zone. Or maybe Kyle is just sleep deprived. He spots the ruckus left behind from last night. They did not have any subtlety, that’s for sure. If Kenny the counsellor wasn’t there to bust their asses out, they’d be fucked. He supposes that includes him too. But it shouldn’t- he didn’t partake in their dumb party. He just had a heart-to-heart with Stan on the shore and got suggestively tackled by him. Totally not the same.</p><p>Kyle walks over and sits down on the sand, facing the lake lapping softly against it. There’s a breeze, not strong enough to push his hood down, but enough to make his nose chill. It’s the kind of quiet he’d desperately looked for yesterday, and he lets out a long breath. He pulls his knees up to his chest and holds himself like he tries to hold his mind together, so many thoughts running amuck.</p><p>He wonders when the counsellors wake up. Surely not for a while. There’s still the faint suggestion of stars in the sky, slowly hiding away against the light. He never got around to checking the time, just needed to get out of his cabin. He’s still wearing his pyjama pants. He’ll need to go back and change properly before the other campers rise- or he’ll be fucked. He has the impression they won’t just ignore Terrance and Phillip faces cartooned onto his pants. Everyone lost the hype in fifth grade, but Kyle still likes what they meant back then- what they meant to him before things started changing and going to shit. If anyone ever asks he’ll say he’s being ironic for kicks.</p><p>He's maybe sitting there in the freezing dawn for fifteen minutes, staring at nothing and overthinking yet again, when a noise breaks him out from his thoughts.</p><p>To his shock and surprise, it’s Kenny. He jumps when Kenny comes up behind him, ‘’Hey dude.’’</p><p>Kyle is frozen for a second, flinching like a deer caught in headlights, even as Kenny comes up and collapses beside him on the sand. His long gangly legs kick out in front of him, and he sighs.</p><p>‘’What-‘’ Kyle doesn’t know how to react, caught off guard and defensively tightening his grip on his knees. Serenity broken, Kyle’s chest pumps hard at the sudden snap.</p><p>‘’Lovely morning ain’t it?’’ Kenny says, staring out into the dark lake. Kyle doesn’t know if he should be running, pretend he wasn’t here to avoid getting in trouble. He’s too sleep-deprived to think straight.</p><p>‘’I was just- I didn’t mean to break the rules- I’ll go back-‘’</p><p>Kenny laughs, ‘’Relax bro-mite, I’m not gonna bust you.’’</p><p>‘’<em>Oh,</em>’’ Kyle unpuffs himself. ‘’But it’s before wakeup time-‘’</p><p>‘’That shit is for the sixth graders who need parental type figures still waking them. You’re what? 16 dude, nobody gives a shit.’’</p><p>‘’But the other counsellors would still bust me for being out here.’’</p><p>‘’Well,’’ Kenny grins at him. ‘’Lucky I’m not the other counsellors huh?’’</p><p>‘’Yeah. Lucky,’’ Kyle finally calms down, his tired brain functioning and realising he’s safe here- for now. He uncurls his knees to a more relaxed position, and turns back toward the lake.</p><p>‘’What are you doing out here anyways?’’ Kenny asks. ‘’Your bunkmates didn’t catch you?’’</p><p>‘’I- couldn’t sleep. And I don’t have any bunkmates,’’ Kyle huffs, pretending he’s not still elated by the development. ‘’They seem to have forgotten about me.’’</p><p>‘’That’s weird,’’ Kenny says. ‘’But I’m not that surprised. The jokers in charge here have no management skills. Their version of a good camp is the idea that everyone is a perfect snowflake to each other and they link hands and sing church songs at the campfire. I noticed you missed the campfire activity last night.’’</p><p>‘’I did? Oh-‘’ Kyle flushes. ‘’I may have fallen asleep and missed it. Stan woke me for the party at midnight.’’</p><p>Kenny is smirking, ‘’Yeah, I bet he did.’’</p><p>Kyle hates Kenny’s smug assuming face, and shoves him into the sand. Kenny laughs, even when he comes back up with sand stuck in his messy blonde hair.</p><p>‘’Where did you guys run off to then? I couldn’t find you after that fight.’’</p><p>‘’We were here, actually,’’ Kyle says looking around. Somewhere around here, Stan confessed being tipsy and pushed Kyle into the sand and made Kyle heat up and die in the stomach over and over in bliss. <em>‘’Talking.’’</em></p><p>‘’He didn’t act like a dumbass right?’’ Kenny asks.</p><p>‘’Huh?’’</p><p>‘’Well- I shouldn’t be saying this,’’ Kenny says. ‘’Stan just gets intense sometimes, I didn’t want him to scare you off or anything.’’</p><p>‘’What- like I’m such a delicate little flower?’’ Kyle scoffs in offense. ‘’I could kick your ass- I don’t care that you’re taller.’’</p><p>‘’I’m sure you could,’’ Kenny says, not believing him. It makes Kyle want to prove it- but he breathes and controls himself. Stupid. ‘’Anyway- what are you doing up? Isn’t the beauty of your job being able to sleep in if you’re not on shift or something?’’</p><p>‘’Well- it doesn’t really work like that. And I’m not a big sleeper either. I spend most nights awake anyway.’’</p><p>‘’Why?’’ Kyle wonders, though he distantly realises it could be insensitive. He wouldn’t want to discuss his issues either. Kenny shrugs.</p><p>‘’Bad dreams or something. More can be done at night anyway. I get twice as much work done.’’</p><p>Kyle notices bag under Kenny’s eyes he’d somehow missed before, ‘’What other work could you be doing? Other counsellors get to sleep right?’’</p><p>‘’Yeah- but not when I spend my working hours hanging out with the guys, introducing redheads to them and planning midnight lake bashes.’’</p><p>‘’Sorry- I didn’t realise my existence put you out so much,’’ Kyle says bitterly, though it’s not Kenny’s fault he’s so pathetic he needs a chauffer to save him from his mother.</p><p>‘’I was being serious before,’’ Kenny says instead of snarking back. ‘’I want you to act in my place this summer. Stan’s my best friend, but he’s needy. He doesn’t understand when I can’t get off from responsibilities to hang out. Doesn’t really get the whole ‘too poor for camp’ thing. So, in exchange for me setting you up with a crew, I want you to do this for me, and distract him.’’</p><p>‘’What- like,’’ Kyle laughs, flushes. ‘’Like some kind of fucking escort?’’</p><p>‘’Hey- dude,’’ Kenny snickers. ‘’If that’s how you wanna play it, no complaints from me.’’</p><p>Kyle didn’t expect that response, and is bright red with embarrassment, ‘’Shut up!’’</p><p>Kyle dumps a handful of damp sand on Kenny’s lap, so Kenny takes some of it and slaps it on Kyle’s head, squishing it into his hair. Kyle shouts in disgust.</p><p>‘’Sick! My hair!’’</p><p>Kenny just laughs, so Kyle stands up and shoves him facedown into the sand in revenge, holding him there when the giggling continues. ‘’Don’t fuck with my hair asshole. I’ll put you down!’’</p><p>‘’Okay okay- I surrender!’’ Kenny chuckles. ‘’The jewfro will remain untouched!’’</p><p>‘’Don’t call it that,’’ Kyle scowls, shoving him down again to eat the sand.</p><p>‘’Man you are <em>perrfect</em> for my little Stanley. Match made in heaven!’’</p><p>Blood rushes to his face so fast, and so mortifyingly that he stomps his foot down onto Kenny’s shoulder and holds him there. ‘’Fuck. Off.’’</p><p>Kenny finally stops laughing, and Kyle leaves his weight pressing down for a few seconds longer before releasing him.</p><p>‘’Fuck man,’’ Kenny sits up, spitting sand out of his mouth overdramatically. ‘’You really don’t like gay jokes huh?’’</p><p>‘’No! I mean, they’re fine. It’s just- insensitive, whatever’’ Kyle rambles, hating himself for making it way too easy. He’s better than this, come on!</p><p>‘’Fair enough,’’ Kenny doesn’t take the easy bait to continue, thankfully. He leans back and faces the now rising soft sunlight. It takes longer- hidden by the tall ominous trees lining the lake, but Kyle is hit with sudden warmth when it reaches them. He breathes and settles back down. It’ll still be awhile before everyone gets up, so he has time. He thought another person sitting alongside him would be more awkward. Maybe people get past that point when they make each other eat sand.</p><p>Kyle thinks about what Kenny said. About becoming his replacement for Stan. Part of it is extremely appealing, he can’t deny. It also sounds risky, somehow. Maybe just in terms of his self-preservation, which will be utterly <em>destroyed</em> if he does this.</p><p>‘’What if Stan catches on, and he doesn’t want me around to be <em>you</em>?’’</p><p>‘’He won’t,’’ Kenny says. ‘’He’d be sad, sure. Which I why I say we keep this between us. But he wants to hang out with you dude- you should have heard him after you left at dinner. I bet Kyle does this, I hope Kyle comes tonight, Man I wonder what Kyle would think, Fuck I wish Kyle could sit next to me again so I can feel his breath in my ear.’’</p><p>‘’You’re fucking lying.’’</p><p>‘’Half true,’’ Kenny nods. ‘’But he’s an idiot and you’re an idiot, you’ll get along just peachy. Stop doubting my great intellect.’’</p><p>‘’Whatever,’’ Kyle scoffs, turning away so his flush isn’t obvious. ‘’Maybe I hate your whole group, what would you do then?’’</p><p>‘’Hey, it could be worse,’’ Kenny says, looking out wistfully. ‘’We could be from <em>South Park</em>.’’</p><p>‘’Hey-‘’</p><p>‘’Your class is pretty crappy dude, I know what you meant at dinner now,’’ Kenny says, honestly somehow. Kyle doesn’t know whether to be loyal and make him eat sand again, or get on his knees and thank him wholeheartedly for someone other than him <em>finally</em> understanding.</p><p>‘’Well- I’m one of them anyway.’’</p><p>‘’You seem cool. I won’t put you on laundry duty- yet.’’</p><p>‘’There’s a <em>laundry duty?’’</em></p><p>‘’Yeah, guess who’ve been ‘mysteriously’ bumped to the top of the list through bad behaviour,’’ Kenny grins.</p><p>‘’You didn’t,’’ Kyle laughs.</p><p>‘’Cartman will have such a lovely task for the next two days, sifting through dirty bedsheets of sixth graders who piss themselves at night from being away from mommy.’’</p><p>Kyle cackles, delighted at the image of him whining and groaning at the stench and being stuck there in a dark dingy laundry room. It brightens him immediately. Cartman’s suffering always has.</p><p>‘’Nice pajamas,’’ Kenny of course notices, eyeing them. Kyle dies inside.</p><p>‘’Heh- yeah, um.’’</p><p>‘’I loved Terrance and Phillip as a kid. My mom could never afford their merch, I was stuck in this huge orange parka thing all through elementary and middle school- even for sleeping in. Goddamn.’’</p><p>‘’Jesus dude,’’ Kyle says, unsure what to make of it. So Kenny was the real deal tragic tale.</p><p>‘’Yep, so that’s me,’’ Kenny sniffs. ‘’Dirt poor bastard who couldn’t afford camp with his friends for the summer, so he had to cheat his way into a counsellor job. It’s sucky, but hey I’m gonna fucking enjoy it while I’m away from the ratsnest.’’</p><p>‘’Well- good for you,’’ Kyle says, very awkwardly but what can he do? He has no idea how to handle sensitive topics anymore. He’s stopped trying to be good at people. ‘’I’m sure you’ll have fun.’’</p><p>‘’You should try too. You looked like the most miserable chump on Satan’s asshole in this whole place. I think if you take that stick out, you’ll actually come to like this dump.’’</p><p>‘’It’s not that easy with me,’’ Kyle says, wondering if he should at least hint something. No, stupid idea. Don’t tell people, no matter how heart-to-heart it gets. ‘’This camp won’t fix the shit going on.’’</p><p>‘’Maybe not. But it’s worth a try right?’’ Kenny looks back to the lake, and chucks a stick into the water, making it ripple. Kyle watches and just thinks.</p><p>They stay down at the lake for a little longer, until Kenny warns he’s due to be rostered for a job today and will have to depart. Kyle is fine with it, wants time to think to himself anyway. He decides to go back when Kenny waves him bye, though maybe not to his cabin. There’s nothing waiting for him there but too recent dreams of being called a fag.</p><p>
  <em>We all knew you liked sucking balls Kahl!</em>
</p><p>Kyle shivers at the reminder and stays away. That’s what he’s saving himself by not telling anyone. It’s the right move.</p><p>He brushes all the excess sand off, frustrated when the sand won’t shake out of his hair, which doesn’t look respectable on a good day, a mess of curls and loudness. It’s cruel irony, how he wants to be left alone, and his hair literally commands a room to his attention.</p><p>He’s starting to feel gross on top of his annoyance, and wonders when their scheduled shower times are. He feels like punching a tree when he realises he may have slept through it yesterday, along with that gay campfire shit he’s quietly determined to never attend this summer. He’ll make any excuse. He’s not above faking a seizure.</p><p>Griminess aside, it’s not a fun realisation to find most of these camp activities will be outdoors- given the lack of facilities not used for sleeping cabins, the main building for the cafeteria and administration, and showers. There’s no indoor entertainment rooms when he checks, and the only places he can find just end up being equipment storage rooms. It’s vaguely horrific, to realise the only peace and quiet he could find this summer is hiding in his cabin and reading the few books he realises will NOT be enough to last. Fucking hip hip hooray.</p><p>Kyle spends the next half hour wiping himself down in the bathrooms, which thankfully aren’t just simple outhouses. There’s only so much fucking genuine camping he can handle. Being reduced to a ‘’shower’’ using wet paper towels and a sink, is not ideal, but he covers the germiest places, listening diligently for other campers to burst in. It’s quiet and still, but that won’t last.</p><p>He laments to return to his cabin only for the necessary use of spraying himself down like a fly that refuses to die with cologne, until he’s thoroughly masked with the powerful fresh scent. It’s good enough for now, but he’ll hunt Kenny down later to let him use a shower while they canoe or something. He won’t survive like this. Right, no more fucking naps, Jesus Christ.</p><p>The chill of the dawn is escaping quickly, the warmth of sunlight enough for him to keep his hoodie off as he redresses from the cologne bath, out of the embarrassing pajamas. Distantly, he can hear outside noise form his cabin, and he knows already that the beasts have awoken. His fellow fucking campers, rearing up to wreck Kyle’s patience. He almost preferred the haunted ass cabin than the idea of going back out there and facing the horrors of puberty in action. Almost.</p><p>It does cheer him however, to think he’s actually got some leg room in a group that is half-decent, (thank you Kenny for your straight up bribe), as he heads to the cafeteria for breakfast. He swears he’s not looking for black, but it’s a secret guilty relief when he finds that suave hair amongst the crowd in the huge common dining room. Kyle is still nervous walking up to him- but they’re close enough now right? He can just tap his shoulder-</p><p>‘’Hey Sta- ew!’’</p><p>It’s Craig who turns around to face him, looking unimpressed as ever. ‘’Fuck you too Broflovski.’’</p><p>Kyle drops his smile into a typical scowl at the worst person on the planet, not his lovely Stan. Who isn’t his- but whatever. ‘’Sorry, I thought you were someone else.’’</p><p>‘’I’m offended,’’ Craig says. ‘’Who apparently looks like me from behind that is pathetic enough to befriend you?’’</p><p>‘’Nobody that concerns you,’’ Kyle snaps. He and Craig didn’t get along on their best day, when he wasn’t outright ignoring Kyle’s existence. Which was often.</p><p>‘’Whatever,’’ Craig rolls his eyes, then frowns at the distance. ‘’Oh. It must be this guy.’’</p><p>Kyle turns to who he’s talking about only to find the <em>real</em> Stan approaching them. Kyle lights up for a stupid second at the sight of him. God fucking damn he’s hot in the morning. His hair is still unbrushed, like he just woke up.</p><p>‘’Oh hey- I guess you guys know each other from school huh,’’ Stan says when he joins them, hands in his jean pockets. Kyle subtly inches closer to him and away from Craig, already flushing at his proximity.</p><p>‘’Unfortunately,’’ Craig responds, sighing like this conversation is taxing him already, though doesn’t look like he has any intention of moving. Maybe he’s waiting for them to leave by being dismissive, that’s his usual style.</p><p>‘’You two have met?’’ Kyle asks.</p><p>‘’We’re in the same cabin,’’ Stan smiles at him sheepishly. Kyle returns it weakly.</p><p>‘’You and that blonde kid kept me awake with your antics,’’ Craig sneers, and Stan grins and shrugs.</p><p>‘’It’s called talking. And that’s your fault for ditching the party. And your own blonde kid kept us up after that with his fits.’’</p><p>‘’Sounds like a ‘you’ problem,’’ Craig says, then sighs and walks away without another word, like he can’t muster the sloppy enthusiasm to be in their presence any longer. Stan and Kyle stare after him, and Stan chuckles.</p><p>‘’What a weirdo. His blonde friend is nice enough though- but also weird,’’ Stan says.</p><p>‘’I don’t know if they’re actually friends. They defy logic,’’ Kyle says. ‘’So I guess you and Butters really did get acquainted to them?’’</p><p>Fucking dumbass obvious rhetorical question, what kind of idiot says-</p><p>‘’Yeah, you were totally right at dinner yesterday,’’ Stan laughs, and Kyle shuts his mouth. ‘’Let’s go find the group and get fat with snail shit- or whatever they put in that porridge.’’</p><p>‘’I’m invited again huh?’’ Kyle asks, half-jokingly, but unwilling to take anything for granted. Stan mocks an offending gasp.</p><p>‘’After all we’ve been through and you don’t think you’re worthy?’’ Stan says, holding his chest. Kyle grins and punches his arm, and Stan ushers him forward, a direct invitation. <em>Yes you’re invited, of course you are. Stop freaking out and accept you dumbass.</em></p><p>He’s still nervous as they collect their half-decent but questionable breakfasts, and walk over to where the Fairplay kids seem to have set up a permanent exclusive table for themselves. If this is what being one of the cool kids feels like, Kyle can say for sure it’s very stressful and performative. He’s used to eating alone.</p><p>The table, to his annoyance, has acquired some new members. Apparently the girls have fucked off to their own group, but it’s with unpleasant surprise (is he <em>really</em> surprised?) to find his own classmates, including Cartman, now sitting amongst the Fairplay ones. Kyle groans as quietly as he can, and sits down beside Stan at the table, bracing himself.</p><p>‘’Looks like douchebag and his butthole boyfriend finally stopped finger banging to join for breakfast guys,’’ Cartman speaks up before Kyle’s ass can even meet the bench. Kyle clenches his jaw and bites his tongue to prevent himself from murdering the fat bitch with a spoon. He <em>will </em>do it.</p><p>‘’Wait, which one is douchebag?’’ Butters asks in sincere confusion.</p><p>‘’The one who tainted my fucking nose maybe?’’ Cartman glares and makes Butters blanche. Cartman’s nose is indeed a nasty shade of purple, a fresh white bandage over it and yellowish bruises sickening around it. Kyle is extraordinarily, disturbingly, turned on that Stan did that. It’s the kind of typical sweetheart that you would never expect to obliterate someone until they do, and it’s just hot. Fuck.</p><p>He pokes at his globby bowl of oats and flushes hard, disturbed by how much Stan’s closeness to him right now affects him. His whole left side feels tingling, mere inches from touching. This is insane, he should NOT be this bad.</p><p>Kyle glances at Stan for a second, but he’s too busy glaring at Cartman for being a dick. Kyle is too distracted to be mad too, which he takes as an absolute win in terms of anger management.</p><p>I wish I’d recorded that moment,’’ Clyde sighs, apparently also present. Kyle isn’t paying attention. Out of the corner of his eye, he watches Stan’s hand poke at his own glop.</p><p>‘’I think maybe you should have it again,’’ Stan says out of nowhere. Challenging him. Kyle watches intently, trying hard not to physically look blissed out. Cartman narrows his eyes.</p><p>‘’You wanna go hippie? I’ve taken karate.’’</p><p>‘’You piece of shit, you took two classes when we were nine and you only went for the Kentucky Fried Chicken afterwards,’’ Kyle exposes, unable to help himself. Cartman’s eyes dart to him and burn a glare. As much as his tubby eyeball receptacles can.</p><p>‘’Kahl, I know you’re too stupid to get this, but butt the fuck out,’’ he snarls. Kyle shrugs, satisfied with himself.</p><p>‘’And stop talking to him like that. He isn’t meat,’’ Stan bites back suddenly, surprising both Kyle and Cartman.</p><p>‘’<em>Oh</em>, oh my bad. I forgot you two ran off last night to fuck and brand Kahl’s ass with your name,’’ Cartman preens, smiling evilly. Kyle is vaguely aware the table is silent and watching their altercation, but he’ll worry about that later.</p><p>‘’You’re just begging to get your skull cracked fatass,’’ Kyle spits.</p><p>‘<em>’Staan,</em>’’ Cartman sings. ‘’Did you know Kyle has no friends at school, and sits alone at lunch so people don’t rip on his loserhood. Did ‘ya know that?’’</p><p>‘’Fuck you.’’</p><p>Kyle is fuming, close to popping his nails off as he grips his hand against the bench he sits, tyring not to start throwing food. Right, what to do? Breath, breath- stop hyperventilating. Somehow kick Cartman’s ass back to last century, but also don’t touch him because it doesn’t help.</p><p>‘’Jeez- Eric, that’s not nice,’’ Butters pipes in weakly from beside him, looking distressed at the soon-to-be-physical fight simmering at the table. The others are wisely silent, though it’s also infuriating. Stan is still glaring lasers, close to achieving it through pure will alone. Kyle is breathing so he doesn’t start ripping heads off with his teeth, suppressing that black rage that doomed him to camp.</p><p>‘’Hey- little twink has spoken you guys. Better listen to little ol’ twink, ha!’’ Cartman cackles at his own dumb joke, hitting Butters back, who looks confused and hurt, until a commotion-</p><p>‘’Hey,’’ It’s Kenny, suddenly here and wedged between Cartman and Butters and sending the fiercest daggers Kyle has ever seen straight down at the lard. It’s death himself, that level intensity. He looks like he’s straining to not hit the bastard too. Kyle really wants him to do it.</p><p>‘’What-‘’</p><p>‘’You will never lay a hand on Leopold again,’’ the words are so calm and measured, which makes them ten times more terrifying, ‘’Unless you want me to shove my steel fist so far up your ass I play you like a ventriloquist. You want that fatboy? Huh, wanna get fisted?’’</p><p>Kenny flexes his fingers in front of Cartman’s face as a threat, then cracks his knuckles, impressively one-handed, into a hard fist. Kyle swears he hears Cartman gulp, swears on his mother’s life.</p><p>The table is still.</p><p>‘’Get away from me you fucking perv,’’ Cartman finally says, a whine in his voice as he stands from the table, shooting daggers to Stan and Kyle one last time, before flipping Kenny off and leaving. Kyle really thought the big room would cheer as he left, ecstatic to see the back of him. Or maybe Kyle is projecting.</p><p>The table remains still, until Kenny takes Cartman’s old pace and sits amongst them, sighing hard. ‘’You okay?’’</p><p>He’s asking Butters, who nods as though in a trance and just woken out of it. Kenny nods in satisfaction to that answer and turns back to face them.</p><p>‘’So… What did I miss?’’</p><p>‘’Um. Nothing, nothing at all,’’ Stan says, honestly somehow. ‘’Where were you?’’</p><p>‘’Counsellor meeting, I’m on crafting and canoeing duty today. I don’t know what you guys are lined up to do yet, but they’ll organise groups after breakfast.’’</p><p>‘’Cool.’’</p><p>‘’Soo, we just gonna ignore that whole fight, or-‘’ Clyde asks, appealing to them. ‘’Just wondering, totally cool if we do.’’</p><p>‘’I think they’ve forgotten already,’’ Token butts in, smirking. Clyde snickers at him for it, but Kyle is too tired to care about that apparent new friendship. He’d been lucky to avoid the drowsiness up until this point, but the completion of that fight and the thought running loose in his head and he just wants to curl up and die. He settles for leaning on his arms and keeping his eyes open by stabbing his cooling paste called ‘food’. He’s pretty hungry, but there’s no way he’s touching it. That shit looks only good for slingshotting it up to stick to the ceiling. Nobody but Cartman (until he stormed off like a pussy ass) has eaten any of the glop.</p><p>‘’Hey,’’ Stan says to him, breaking him out of thinking about glop. ‘’You okay?’’</p><p>What does he do? No, he’s completely and utterly fucked, and emotionally drained and it’s only the second freaking day. He won’t survive this place, he knows it.</p><p>‘’Yeah, I’m good.’’ <em>Lies.</em></p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Follow me for more crack:<br/><a href="https://www.instagram.com/lozislaw/">Instagram</a><br/>or<br/><a href="https://lozislaw.tumblr.com/">Tumblr</a></p></blockquote></div></div>
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